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Okkervil River and New Pornographers in Toronto


in Canadiana, Musical

The Phoenix played host to one of the best double bills I’ve seen Wednesday night. Okkervil River technically opened for the New Pornographers, but both bands played power-packed sets that left my friends and the entire room more than… pornografied and okkervilled. The venue reminded me of the Paradise in Boston in the way that the main room is wider than longer, and no matter where you’re standing you have a great, close view.

new pornos okkervil

When we got to the front door of the venue one of my peeps had a camera cord hanging out of her back pocket. Although we were all packing cameras, no one was patting people down so she was the only one who got nicked. The indecisive and dodgy doorman held us to one side for almost 10 minutes before he finally agreed she could hide her battery outside and we’d be allowed to go in with the camera. Due to that incident and the many warnings he gave us, none of us took any pictures. Perhaps someone else who was there has posted something online I can use. I’m a bit miffed about this because we were very close to the stage and I could have gotten some doozy video.

Okkervil opened with The President’s Dead and their energy was immediately apparent as the drummer, sitting low and immediately beside lead singer Will Sheff, mouthed along with the words while pointing playfully at audience members with his drumsticks until his cue to start playing. About four songs in they played a fast and rocky version of my personal favorite, A Girl in Port, which I thoroughly dug. Their hour long set wrapped up with the awesome For Real and I was so satisfied I felt like it was time to go home. But things were really just getting started.

The NP’s casually took the stage with the house lights still up and the crowd went wild. The band, based in Vancouver, has an enormous following up here and are one of the biggest internationally-successful Canadian bands ever. When I saw them open for Belle and Sebastian at Avalon in 2006, band member Neko Case was not on the tour with them, so Wednesday night was a new experience for me. Sure enough they played my jam, Bones of an Idol, as well as Slow Descent into Alcoholism (which should be my jam), Bleeding Heart Show and all of the other staples. The highlight for me was actually a cover. They pulled off a thoroughly engrossing version of “Don’t Bring Me Down” by E.L.O and I will never look at that song the same way again. I loved it and it was a perfect encore.

It’s been a long while since I’ve been to a concert, or to the T-Dot, and I couldn’t have asked for a better one. Well worth the drive to Toronto. We hit a gay strange bar after the show and the night ended on a very bizarre note for a variety of reasons, but it was a wonderful break nonetheless. Janet and I worked at Jason and Amy’s dining room table all day yesterday and I walked Marj down to Duff’s on Bayview for a take out lunch from my Mecca, Duff’s. When the veritable Vendittis got home we then we capped the trip off with a delicious dinner at Zucca before driving back East and getting into Portland around 12:30 am.

Now it’s Friday morning, my internet is down and I am writing this post in a notepad file until I hopefully upload it at a later time. I had planned to spend the weekend repairing and staining all the sections of our dock so they’re in tip-top shape to be installed in a couple of weeks when it warms up some more, but at this rate I’ll be inside on the computer catching up. Wicked. I’m rambling. Good concert and I missed my puppies.

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Wednesday Wadio: New Pornographers ‘Bones of an Idol’


in

Short one today, folks, as my sister and I are driving 6 hours to see New Pornographers and Okkervil river in Toronto tonight. 3 hours there and 3 hours back tomorrow – so hardly a big deal – but I am cramming to get work done so I’ll have to ‘peace out’. Here’s NP playing one of my favorites, “Bones of an Idol”, at Lollapalooza back in 2006 on the Twin Cinema tour. Have a look at the lyrics, as they’re hard to make out here, and tell me if I’m wrong in my assumption that this song is about none other than my favorite adventurer, Dr. Henry Jones Jr…

You hold up the cup
You’ve been searching for
Since you were young
When you still had the bones of an idol
If you still had the bones of an idol
You’d be long long gone
But something keeps turning you on

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nisYw87VAWc[/youtube]

I saw the band open for Belle and Sebastian myself in 2006 in Boston, and tonight it’s another amazing double pornoish bill at the Phoenix Theatre in the T-Dot. Read my earlier Wadio about A Girl in Port if you’re into the Okkervils – and I’ll see you tomorrow with photos and a couple of new concert t-shirts. Because that’s what I do.

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Wednesday Wadio: Porno For Pyros ‘New Rising Sun’.


in Wednesday Wadio

When I was living in Mills Hall at Guelph, back when it was still an all-male residence and absolute zoo, I had a videotape of the then fresh Woodstock 94 concert. This was my favorite clip, and I can’t count the number of times I watched it whilst polishing off 18 packs of Arctic Wolf with Nick Gordon and Steve Barry. Porno for Pyros was Perry Farrel’s dalliance in between Jane’s Addiction tours – and for the unfamiliar he’s the guy who perfoms the Entourage theme song (a 2002 Jane’s tune). So this is PFP at Woodstock 94 performing ‘New Rising Sun‘ which is a little known Jimmi Hendrix song, and it was an homage to the original concert.

Perry starts the song, the last in their set, by toasting the audience with a bottle of red wine which I’m sure was among several he had that day. A marked improvement from heroin, at any rate. I can’t believe this was 12 years ago now, and I hope you enjoy the dreamy way in which they cover this tune and completely hypnotize everyone in attendence. Again , not with heroin for a change. I remember looking obsessively for an audio recording of this for years afterwards, and now so many years on it’s as simple as pasting a code snippet.

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Friday’s Quizzlet: A Date For The Porn.


in Monday's Quotelet

Appetizer: What movie soundtracks do you own?
If by own you mean ‘find’ online – I recently got Spamalot, and have always been partial to Blade Runner. Vangelis, not the orchestral version. Once, 10 years ago when I worked at David’s Bistro in Acton, I put the BR soundtrack into the dining room stereo alongside Sinatra, Ella, etc. I was really into it at the time and thought it was amazing. I honestly believed the somber, space melodrama would go over like gangbusters on the suburban, rich Massachusetts crowd. After the third diner shoved a rusty nail through their hand, I skipped over to In the Wee Small Hours.

Soup: How much cash do you usually spend on a weekend?
Depends what I’m doing, who I’m with and where I am, I suppose. There are wedding weekends – which cost as much as most cars, and then there’s couch weekends – where $4 will get you a pint of Ben & Jerry’s and Meatballs 2. I forgot there was a space alien in Meatballs 2. How did Bill Murray not rush back to do this? (I am working from home today).

Salad: Have you ever seen an adult movie? Who is your favorite actor?
Can I plead the 5th on this one? There was an impressive stash of smut in my house growing up which I quickly located and pilfered. Probably explains a lot. When I was far too young to be enjoying it, I was a solid Amber Lynn fan. Recently, I saw Jim Norton do an interview with Belladonna which was hilarious – so I checked out some of her distinguished work. Breathtaking. Anyhew, porn stars are like legitimate celebrities now, and I shudder to think what future generations of warped youth are going to deem normal. “Sure I’ll go to the Prom with you, but only if you pee on me during Stairway to Heaven“.

Main Course: What is the most mischievous thing you remember doing as a child?
I’ve got to talk about “the move”. At Manotick Public School, where I did kindergarden – grade 5, the true measure of a man was their ability to play King of the Mountain. The harsh Ottawa winters would produce mountains of snow, pushed to the sides of the school parking lot by plows. After a fresh downfall, there would be enormous walls of packed snow all over the place. When recess came, we’d all run out of the doors, through the lot and start climbing up the piles. You had to get up there early, or you’d get taken out before you got settled.

There were 3 bullies who usually had it in for me – the Hutt twins and Richie. They were all big farm kids who liked to prove their toughness against me at every opportunity – as I was a big kid too. So after we’d collectively finished off all of the smaller buggers, they’d set their sights on me. Now, when you got pushed off of the mountain, you’d fall a good distance and sometimes split your lip. So the stakes were high. I developed a “move” that no one was able to dodge or replicate – and I won every single lunchtime. When one of them would charge towards me, their arms extended, I would tuck my arms into my chest and begin to spin – but slowly neough that they couldn’t really notice. When they hit me, arms fully extended, my momentum would spin them around 90 degrees and they’d be rife for a violent kick in the ass, and off the mountain. I call it ‘snow cred’ looking back.

Dessert: Have you seen your family tree? Does one exist?
I emailed my aunt just last week to get some info on my family – as I realized how little I knew. I don’t even know my grandfather’s first name, for example. He died when my father was 13. I found a site called Ancestry.com and decided to start a tree there – then send it to older members of my extended family to see what we come up with. I will keep you posted on my family tree, as I’m sure you’re all waiting to hear that I’m the missing link.

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New Pornographers/Belle & Sebastian @ Avalon, Boston.


in Musical

At one point during the concert tonight, I turned to the group of friends and siblings I was with and made the uproariously hilarious remark: “Hi, I’m the Boston Fire Inspector. Thanks a lot for not inviting me?” The February 28th Belle and Sebastian show at Avalon in Boston (just a pause for the search engines here, folks) was grossly oversold, and I’d like to sarcastically thank the powers that be for jamming us in there like branded cattle. I’ve seen about 800 shows there since 1988 – including packed houses like Coldplay and the Pixies, and I’ve never been welfarically uncomfortable before. I could actually see the panic attacks taking place on the faces of the people around me. Especially when New Pornographers covered “Once Bitten, Twice Shy“. All horribly tasteless jokes aside, that was a real pain in the ass you money grubbing Landsdowne fucks.

The NP‘s were great, and I’m adding their new song Bones of an Idol to the Wadio right now so have a listen on your left. I’ve spun it 8 times already today – it’s awesome. They’re from Vancouver, and have developed a huge ex-pat following a la the Hip here in Boston. I saw tons of Maple Leafs being rocked on hats, scarves and jackets last night. They use two keyboards, a mouth organ and male/female vocal mix that’s about 50/50. A pulsing, unique sound that I’m going to be delving into deeply over the next few weeks. Super band.

Belle and Sebastian sounded amazing, despite the fact we eventually retreated to one of Avalon’s back corners when the crowds began to surge forward. One thing about hipster crowds – they don’t brush their teeth and fart uncontrollably. I have to chalk it up to all the cheap food available in Davis square, or the fact that sometimes they’re forced to eat Decemberist records when their student loans run out. Either way, it was like a focus group for Crest and Gas-X and I gladly hid in the back, hence my completely awful pictures. Not to mention I was asked to stop taking photos by a 4-foot tall bouncer who also smelt like he’d been eating aquarium scum.

I thoroughly enjoyed Stuart’s silly dancing, and the horns sounded perfect. Judy and the Dream of Horses and Seeing Other People were the highlights for me, although Stu forgot the first verse of the latter. These guys are a tight, tight outfit. The tour has just started, and here’s a list of the dates lest you wish to venture out. Just remember to wear fire retardent clothing and to spread Vaporub under your nostrils like Clarice Starling.

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Happy Birthday, You Filthy Pornography-Ridden Cesspool.


in

HTTP Protocol was introduced in 1990, making the internet as we know it officially 15 years old. A recent article on CNN lists their personal top ten internet moments – including WiFi, Google, Live8, Skype, Napster and others. There are some glaring omissions, however. Namely, the black sheep of the internet. That of which major media will not speak the name. You know, the good stuff. Like Catster.

In the interests of not making my subversive surfing habits public record, I invite you, the reader, to share some of your more disturbing WWW discoveries in the comments below. I just think that if we’re going to mark such an important anniversary, some light should be shone on where the real money is made, and where the real traffic ebbs and flows. Sure, NeoPets is a lot of fun, and has become an enormous success, but it does me absolutely no good when I’m drinking by myself on a Saturday night with a greasy container of coconut oil.

I’ll get the ball rolling with a few of my guilty favorites:

– Ogrish.com: People who work in law enforcement in China, Pakistan, Iraq and Brazil send in ridiculous crime scene photographs. Not for the faint of heart.

– RatherGood.com: I hope someone eventually gets this guy the mental help that he so desperately needs. But his Flash movies are absolutely hilarious.

– YouAintNoPicasso.com: Courtesy of Nate, this site is an amazing resource for getting obscure MP3s of ‘alternative’ bands. The webmaster will be locked away in a dank prison cell at any moment, so enjoy this copyright treachery while you can.

I will add some more later. Have to get going. Please contribute your own, and happy thwapping.

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I Welcome A Little Porn In My Work E-mail.


in

I am lucky enough to work in an office that walks a fine line between the formal and the informal. We have all the trappings of a strict corporate environment – dress code, office hours, vacation policy, bonus structure, etc. What we lack, thankfully, is a designated network administrator who spends all of their time filtering this and blocking that… Effectively ruining everyone’s extremely inappropriate workday fun.

I’m obviously kidding. The internet is a hostile Petri dish of wormies and crickets – perhaps even more bacterially volatile than Courtney Love’s last pap smear. We need vigilant network admins in larger environments – it’s just that here we’re all tech-savvy enough to know what sort of online activity is safe, and what’s tantamount to shooting your PC with a 12 gauge. I was also recently able to determine, through hours of research – once and for all, that Virtual Valerie is not a real person.

Still, there’s nothing quite like firing up Outlook on a Tuesday morning to unwittingly download photos of a lovely young woman who holds the record for the most consecutively employed marital aids. Honey – where do you go from here? Might I suggest a medicine ball or a SCUD missle?

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Accidental Video Game Porn.


in

Well blow me down and stroke my pixels. Since it’s a holiday today and most of us aren’t working, here’s a nice little time waster to giggle at and then possibly masturbate to. The Accidental Video Game Porn Archive is a delightful tribute to the famous (Ring King blowjob, Moonwalker pedophelia etc.) and not-so-famous gamery embarassments of the last 20 years.

So click on through and enjoy the collection. I’ll be sitting here trying to figure out who in their right minds has the time to put something like this together – and also why I’m so aroused.

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Tuesday Linkies: Harp for Chicks and Boardwalk Zod


in Tuesday Linkies

hathaway-buscemiSo many cool things pass through my field of vision on a daily basis, are “shared” quickly on Facebook and then subsequently lost to the ether, forever. That means it’s time for a new feature on Pye in the Face – a link list on Tuesdays. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I’ll begin…

  • Helmet-cam video from an insane urban downhill mountain bike in Chile. So, so cool. Watch for the dog that nearly gets smoked about 30 seconds in.
  • A one-time, 2 hour harmonica class in Boston for women only. May 16th at the BCAE taught by blues harpist and local performer Annie Raines and it’ll only run you $35.
  • Michael Shannon from Boardwalk Empire has been cast as General Zod in the latest Superman franchise reboot – and he’s frickin’ perfect.
  • Sasha Grey has retired from porn. Notable because no other adult star has ever made as many inroads into “legitimate” entertainment. Or violent anal.
  • Canadians reschedule Thursday’s French language election debate when they realize it’s also the first Boston/Montreal NHL playoff game. We have our priorities, budday!
  • When Chicks With Steve Buscemeyes ended up on CNN this morning, it officially ceased to be cool. Still, that doesn’t make it any less awesome and they had it before me.

I’m going to keep a running list as I progress through my weeks so future instalments will likely be longer/better. You get the point though, right? I mean, there’s only 562,240 other blogs also doing this. That’s me: pushing envelopes and setting trends. You’re welcome.

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Friday’s Quizzlet: A Nightmare on Pennsylvania Avenue


in Friday's Quizzlet

Fancy another reader-generated Quizzlet for all of us to answer? I certainly do. I’m going to Tweet and Facebook this request as well, so there’s no escape for any of you. Please post any silly or serious questions (in the comments below) that you’d like to hear answered by your friendly neighborhood narcissistic prick – namely, me. We need a grand total of 5. Update: OK, we got there.

Appetizer: Who’s the douchiest celeb in Hollywood (besides Kanye)? – Dana G.

joe-francis-paris-hilton-tit I’m glad you added that clarification, Dana, because I definitely would have gone after that ridiculous pinhead if you hadn’t. The word “celebrity” is a strong word to use when describing this guy, but the award has to go to Girls Gone Wild creator, Joe Francis. How he has managed to end up bedding celebutantes the likes of Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton on the strength of simply videotaping drunken, barely legal females on Spring Break is a mystery to us all. Couple that fact with the jail time he’s done as a result of his paparazzi-pornographer status, and the recent charges against him for… everything under the sun… and he definitely wins today’s PITF award for being an outstanding douchebiscuit. Or maybe I’m just a little jealous.

Soup: Will the Nightmare on Elm Street 2010 remake merely disappoint the loyal following of the House of Freddy? – Angie F.

fat-kid-sandlot I’m really happy about Jackie Earle Haley being cast as the new Freddy Krueger because he’s perfect (in his own creepy way) and without a solid Fred the film would die on the vine without a doubt. Meyers and Voorhees, both of whom have had their franchises more or less successfully resuscitated over the past year, are very different entities. They don’t talk. They wear masks so there aren’t even facial expressions to consider. Notice, pursue, kill. They might as well be mindless robots, so their 2009 versions weren’t all that critical to the success or failure of the new Friday the 13th or Halloween movies. Freddy on the other hand obviously speaks and was always played by Robert Englund as full of sadistic personality with a strong dose of wicked humor. In my opinion, on the “evil scale” Freddy made Jason and Michael Myers look like the red-headed fat kid from The Sandlot. The actor is therefore crucial in this case and Haley is ideal. Admittedly it will be hard for me to picture Kelly from Bad News Bears as a re-animated child murderer with 100% of his body covered in 18th degree burns. But he was nominated for an Oscar in 2007, so stranger things have happened.

Salad: If you could be just one player from a sport or an athletic team, who would it be and why? – Kat

I haven’t been following any sport recently, except maybe hockey, with the zeal I once did, but I’ve always had a soft spot for Larry Bird. Maybe it’s because we share a birthday. Perhaps it’s because I was absolutely basketball-obsessed as a kid in the 80s. Maybe it’s because he’s from a town called French Lick and hearing that phrase invariably gives me a naughty pause for thought. My point is – I simply don’t know why it’s Bird. But it’s Bird.

Main Course: What wedding song should be banned forever (besides Lady in Red)? – Seany Mac

How about that “Butterfly Kisses” song? If I were to hear it at a wedding in the Ozark Mountains, and the bride was in possession of three teeth, I’d think to myself, “Fair enough. When in Rome.” But when I hear it at the wedding of someone I went to high school with it makes me want to grab the DJ’s mic like they were Taylor Swift and then stop the insanity.

Dessert: Over half a year in, have your feelings towards Barack Obama changed at all, and if so – exactly how? – Matt H.

For those of you who don’t remember I wrote a long, thought out piece last year about why I didn’t feel Obama was fit for the Presidency and the specific reasons as to why. That’s not to say I didn’t think he’d ever be ready – quite the opposite. In many ways he was already very qualified. If good looks and a talent for public speaking were the major responsible prerequisites for the insanely important position he’d have had my vote. But it isn’t and he didn’t. Unfortunately, if you were to ask 90% of people back then why they were planning to vote for Obama they’d have said, “He’s well-spoken.” If you doubt me on that then your memory is a wee bit selective. I still feel that his election was premature, he had precious little tangible experience and his campaign had an incredibly advanced grasp of the power of social media and the internet in general. That having been said, I’ve since warmed up to him. He’s been tough on troublesome international leaders like Putin and Chavez. He has brass balls. He’s a remarkably cool and composed dude – at all times. If he fails to achieve an 8-year term it will be as a direct result of his healthcare stance and he must tread very carefully over the next few months. Socialized healthcare sucks, and I’m speaking with more experience than any person should have. Sorry – I think I must have hit my head there or something. Back to the dick jokes…

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Not Quite a Quizzlet: “Your Names”


in Friday's Quizzlet

I don’t take the time to fill out many of these, kids, but I enjoyed this one and it didn’t take 3 hours to complete. My favorite is #7 – Best Superhero name in human history, and those were seriously the first two words that came to mind. Give ‘er a shot yer darn selves.

YOUR REAL NAME: David James Pye

2. WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother and fathers middle names): Douglas Elizabeth

3. NASCAR NAME: (first name of your mother’s dad, father’s dad): Jimmy Stanley

4. STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name): Pyeda

5. DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal): Cobalt Blue Canine

6. SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, town where you were born): James Ottawa

7. SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd fav color, fav drink, add “THE” to the beginning): The Maroon Harpoon

8. FLY NAME: (first 2 letters of 1st name, last 2 letters of your last name): Daye

9. STREET NAME: (fav ice cream flavor, fav cookie): Mint Chocolate Chip Chocolate Chip

10. PORN NAME: (1st pet’s name, street you grew up on): Apple Island View

11. YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (first 3 letters of last name plus izzle): Pyeizzle

13. YOUR IRAQI.. NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, first two letters of your middle name, last two letters of your first name then last three letters of your last name): Aejaidpye

14. YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one of your pets): Black Shepherd

Sharper than an M.I.T. student on adderall. Stronger than a hunk of unpasturized blue cheese left in a shoebox slightly above room temperature for a week. Criminals everywhere would shake in their shiny boots at the mere mention of… The Maroon Harpoon!

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The Immediate Future of PITF


in Pye in the Face

I can’t take it anymore. My current install of Wordpress, the application which powers this blog, is currently so corrupt that most people can’t comment and I can’t save any backend changes whatsoever. Might as well rename it www.Blagojevich.tv. I have tried to avoid a complete reinstallation but at this point I don’t think there is any way to avoid it. I recently migrated a Wordpress blog for a friend and my confidence in that process has increased a bit, so I am thinking now is the time for action. Now is the time I reclaim Pye in the Face from the wee gremlins and ghosties that have been gumming up the works for the past 6 months. It must be great again!

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of the times. Now is the winter that, discontented, I reinstall Wordpress.” – Me

If you pass by and see anything wacky going on in the next few days, you’ll know why. I refuse, however, to be held responsible for any and all niche Austrian pornography which may appear here in my absence. Especilly those midget clowns that pee on female ringmasters. I may have just dreamed that, though.

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Bullets Over Brockville


in

I am desperately trying to get my crippled blog back into fighting form – I appreciate you all bearing with me and I have someone working on the technical issues. In the meantime I’ll fire out a few blurbs that have been on my mind.

  • The Denver DNC: I haven’t seen cannibalism like this since that wonderful movie about the Uruguayan rugby team crashing in the Andes. Keep it up, Dems. Please.
  • The last long weekend of the summer is ahead, I have more work to do than I care to think about, and I’m still trying to keep this blog moving along. Am I in possession of a labor of love – or severely cockeyed priorities? I’m not entirely sure.
  • Has there ever been a porn movie called “Cockeyed”? Note to self, call Larry Flynt.
  • When looking over my bank statements today and feeling temporarily optimistic I suddenly remembered the pontoon I bent whilst hitting a sneaky rock with the boat. Bye bye disposable income for September.
  • The new boat will be named “Pyeseas 2” after the original “Pyeseas” which was the 25-foot cabin cruiser my father restored all by himself when I was a little kid. The words “Pye” and “seas” are self explanatory, but my father is also a Pisces, and I believe it was my Aunt Susan who came up with the name back in the mid-eighties when Dad tasked family and friends with devising the perfect name.
  • A longer post about my Dad’s current situation will follow after all the blog glitches have been remedied.
  • This winter will be about buckling down, reviving those dusty side-projects which I feel are still worthwhile and putting money in the bank. And skidooing. Note to Gooch: Get those fucking sleds up here pronto, Gooch.
  • I now have 5 weddings to go to in September. Yes, you heard me correctly, 5. Better reschedule the whole ‘buckling down financially’ thing to October.

That last point has left me so exasperated that the only way to cheer myself up is to now go back to work – so you know it’s bad. I am actually looking forward to each and every single one of the joyous occasions, but I won’t lie – I’ve been crying myself to sleep.

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Taxing the Internet? Seriously, Frig Off


in Endorsements

A pal ‘o mine has just launched a website designed to create a petition against, and awareness surrounding, a proposed internet tax which could be implemented shortly after the election in November. McCain has already denounced it, and I imagine Obama will follow suit – so it’s not really a dividing issue. Still, you should be aware of it and I hope you take the time today to sign your name.

internet-tax

The tax will actually be aimed at ISPs (Internet Service Providers) and they will no doubt pass those additional monies on to you – their customers. So you’re not only sounding off on a current event, you’re helping to ensure your internet bill doesn’t suffer a considerable increase about 6 months from now. It literally takes seconds to contribute a signature – Mr. Zarrella strove to make it as simple as possible. Your email addresses will not be sold, distributed or otherwise spammed in any way. Do it today, and keep your many hours spent on YouPorn.com as inexpensive as possible.

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Friday’s Quizzlet: A Cat by Any Other Name


in Friday's Quizzlet, Monday's Quotelet

Appetizer: Who was the last person you hugged?
My father when he arrived yesterday. Shepherd was nipping excitedly at his feet the whole time and my father pointed at him and said “What’s that cat’s name?” I replied, “His name is Shepherd Pye, he’s a dog and he’s also your Grandson”. “Oh!” he replied and laughed. Dad thinks the puppies are hilarious, and Mom is genuinely crazy about them. I knew in my bones that having the whelps here would be good for both of them, and if yesterday was any indication – I was right.

Soup: Share a beauty or grooming trick or tip with us.
Don’t wait until someone remarks upon them to trim your nose hairs. We’re all getting older, boys.

Salad: What does the color yellow make you think of?
The first new Volkswagen I ever rode in. Incidentally, it was the very first one ever in England. Omar, one of the slightly dodgy “car dealers” who used to hang out at the Hinds Head, took me for a spin. Much to the chagrin of everyone else in the pub who wanted a ride as well. Or, more likely, for me to serve them another pint. Those guys were great when they weren’t hitting on my girlfriend.

Main Course: If you were to make your living as a photographer, what subject would your pictures revolve around?
I saw a book once of 19th century crime scene photos which I really dug. I leafed through the whole thing right in the store. Short of building a time machine that wouldn’t work, but my answer would have to be something as equally fascinating for me. So, in a word, porn.

Dessert: What was the longest book you ever read?
The third to last book I read, Brother Fish, took me months to finish. At 800 pages it’s on the long side, but it’s hardly the Winds of War. I just wasn’t into reading that much over the summer. I’m on a Canadian history kick at the moment, and am currently reading National Dreams – the thesis of which is that many Canadian Myths are just that. The valor of the RCMP, the CPR as a nation building catalyst, the ideology of the canoe, etc. I’m enjoying the heck out of it but it’s very lefty and almost facetious in the way it strives to break down absolutely everything this country holds dear and I’m keeping that well in mind. I went to high school in the States so I have a lot to learn in terms of the Great White North’s past.

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