Pye in the Face

Appetizer: Invent a new flower; give it a name and describe it.
The flower’s name would be Robaxibloom, and it would have magical back pain healing properties. I have been bed-ridden for most of this week, hence my lack of posts. About two hours after cleaning the garage on Sunday I developed an ache that has just gotten worse ever since and I think I’m going to have to hit the local ER soon if it doesn’t fade. It’s insane… and far worse than the pain from my official football back injury 16 years ago that kept me from playing for Wilfred Laurier/tying my own shoes for a month.

Soup: Name someone whom you think has a wonderful voice.
For singing and speaking my all time favorite is Dean martin. I have been honing a Dino impression for several years now and as a result have been paying a lot of attention to the little nuances. It’s like warm olive oil being poured over vanilla ice cream. And it sounds far better than it tastes.

Salad: On a scale of 1 to 10 how clean do you keep your car?
Inside, 9.5. Outside a 6 in the winter and a 9 in the summer. I keep it very clean as it’s the first decent car I’ve ever owned and I’d like to keep it looking pristine for as long as I have it. Plus, DNA evidence can really come back to haunt you.

Main Course: How do you feel about poetry?
Classic poetry, like the kind I had to read reams of in University, is wonderful stuff. Slam poetry is, in a word, retarded. I’d rather listen to Marc Smith writhing around in pain on a microphoned sheet of wax paper with a car battery attached to his nipples. Or Pearl Jam.

Dessert: What was the last person/place/thing you took a picture of?
My puppies, of course. They are very photogenic and I’m not going to force them upon my readers yet again. But, if you must know, they went to the vet this morning for their last immunization shot and are now allowed to visit dog parks, come with us into town, etc. They averaged about 12 pounds each and are nearly halfway to their full size and doghood. They met a beagle at the office today and seemed to really socialize well. I think we’ve got a pair of healthy, reasonably well adjusted pups on our hands. So far so good. Can you tell how much pain I am in by reading this dry white toast of a post? Must… get… horizontal…

It’s remotely possible that you have yet to grow tired of my puppy chatter. If that is the case then I think you’re really going to enjoy this video I recorded and spliced together last night from various clips of me walking Shepherd and Rhuby up to the top of Space mountain. That’s what I call our most treacherous driveway which has been the scene of many Dodge Chargers sliding off the road this winter. OK - the same Charger, many times. An aside: I love my car but I would have gone with a 4WD vehicle had I known what I was in for out here in the wilds.

The aforementioned road is losing its ‘bite’ as the snow melts, and now the only real headache it delivers is two muddy little puppies who enjoy long walks from start to finish. I decided to take them for a good run yesterday, as they were bouncing off the walls of my room as I worked and I thought a new video was also in order. They’ve grown quite a lot since the last one and I’m sure there’s at least a couple of curious parties out there still reading. Enjoy the muddy madness…

I absolutely hate to impose boring videos on my friends, family or readers so I always take the time to try to structure it a little bit and most importantly keep it short and funny. In the next 3.5 minutes you’ll hear music from Black Francis, Jerry Lee Lewis and Travis. You’ll see a funny dog burp, a frightened herd of deer and my two muddy buddies. There are even a couple of Steve Austin sound effects thrown in for good measure. Hope ya liked it and happy Thursday.