A tragedy to most, the Maiale family welcomed Katrina as an opportunity to narrowly escape from Emeril.
Monday’s Quotelet: The Rivers of Pork.
A tragedy to most, the Maiale family welcomed Katrina as an opportunity to narrowly escape from Emeril.
A tragedy to most, the Maiale family welcomed Katrina as an opportunity to narrowly escape from Emeril.
Friday’s Quizzlet: Concatenating Kevin Costner.
Appetizer: Who is someone you would consider to be a calm person?
I have thought about this for a few minutes now, and no one is really coming to mind. How about a bomb squad technician? A skydiving instructor? A police officer? Anyone who risks their life daily for a paycheck. I only risk my sanity.
Soup: What was your last “gut feeling” about? Were you right?
There’s a really simple anser to this question, but there are elements of my personal life that I don’t like to talk about on the site. So I’ll avoid the best answer and reply as follows. There was never any question in my mind that Michael Stipe was as gay as an Easter parade.
Salad: List 3 words that you really don’t like how they sound.
I hate the word concatenate. It’s tough to say, and I have to say it frequently at work. I’ve also never been crazy about chaff. And there is a town next to Guelph, where I went to University, named Puslinch (pronnounced Pee-you-zlinch) that always made my skin crawl.
Main Course: What kind of shampoo and conditioner do you use?
Whatever’s around, really. I honestly don’t spend much money on ‘product’. I have also been known to wash my hair with whatever bar of soap I’m using. It’s my daily little prison fantasy ritual. Indulge me, and also please send 2 cartons of cigarettes.
Dessert: If you had a guardian angel, what would you name it?
Kevin Costner, of course. There’s never been a better Bodyguard.
My Name Is Craig. Daniel Craig.
Way to busy to do a proper quizzlet today. Meetings, dentist, interns and the like. But as always I’ll get to it over the weekend. In the meantime, please discuss the hot topic of the day – and no, it has nothing to do with a bombing, Nicole Richie or a natural disaster. Although these are often synonymous. I’m here all week – try the martinis.
Since my #1 choice didn’t want the role, I am now quite happy with the selection of Daniel Craig as the next (“grittier and darker“) 007. If you’ve seen Layer Cake, you know this guy can pull of some serious action. His rugged fugliness is also a departure from the poofiness of Brosnan, Moore and Dalton – and a bit of a throwback to the tougher, more mean-spirited and thuggish Bond that Sean Connery brought to the screen.
This publicity photo, the first of Craig as Bond, really says it all. “The actor said he was not looking to redefine the role, but added: “It’s a question of taking it somewhere maybe where it’s never gone before.” Oh, James.
These Pipes… Are CLEAN!
Some workmates and I went down to Brookline last night to Chris Elliott‘s book reading event at the Coolidge Corner Theatre. I have been a fan of Chris’ since I was a sprog and saw him do an interpretation of William Shatner’s interpretation of Rocket Man on David Letterman. Chris was hilarious, reading from his new book Shroud of the Thwacker for 15 minutes and then taking questions from the audience for another 45.
Upon listening to all the questions that were rapid-fired to him, I realized how many movies Chris has been in that I had completely forgotten about. He’s the cameraman in Groundhog Day, a deep sea miner in The Abyss, Oogie in There’s Something About Mary – and he even played a forensic psychologist in Michael Mann’s far superior Red Dragon precursor, Manhunter. He was asked about all of these, Letterman, obscure specials he’s done for pay TV and of course – Get A Life. “We had no idea there were so many people watching that show. And unfortunately, neither did Fox“.
After the Q&A, The Coolidge screened Cabin Boy – an equally reviled and unsung movie which Elliott hasn’t disowned, but admits he can’t watch because its box office failure was a huge blow and seriously derailed his career back in the early 90s. The packed house went absolutely nuts for it, and he was visibly moved. He signed copies of his book in the back as the audience laughed their heads off, and I felt very happy for him – as he obviously had no idea what his work has meant to so many people. It was quite a thing to be there and watch that kind of realization. This is the first book proper book he’s ever written, and he’d never done a flesh-pressing tour like this in his life.
I waited a long time to get up to talk to him, and I am kicking myself for forgetting my camera at home as he was graciously posing with anyone who wanted a snap. I bought a copy of his book, shook his hand and had a little chat. After he signed the book, I asked him “Are you sick of seeing these yet?” at which point I slyly slipped him the insert from my Cabin Boy DVD in the hopes he’d sign it. “Not at all!” he replied. “In fact, after tonight I am going to call Adam Resnick and see if he wants to do a re-release with a proper commentary and some special features.” He looked up after signing it and smiled. “You had no idea there was a market like this did you?” I asked – “I had no idea” he replied. He shook my hand again and I returned to my seat somewhere near the “Fishstick Kitty” scene.
Chris Elliott is a genius, and a genuinely friendly person to boot. I wish him the best and encourage all of you to seek out more of his amazing work.
Wednesday Wadio: The Go! Team’s ‘Huddle Formation’
“Throwing together electro, 70’s cop show theme music, Bollywood soundtracks, cheerleading chants, old hip hop and noise guitar bands with a wide-eyed sense of possibility where everything crashes into everything else with a breathless, delighted, abandon. The Go! Team seem to be suffering from a collective brain-wrong that is gloriously, euphorically right.” – Amazon.com
If you took the buzz and drone of early Sonic Youth, mixed it with the frantic drumming and splashy cymbals of the worst indie rock band you’d ever heard and then paid a group of double-dutching young girls 2 boxes of Mike and Ike‘s to sing backup vocals – You’d be closing in on the sound of England’s The Go! Team.
I’ve had this album for over a year now, and it’s finally been released in the USA. The reason it took so long is because of the mountain of samples they had to clear – I have noticed a few minor variations from the UK release but it still packs a wicked punch and is like nothing I’ve ever heard.
“Every tune surges, every chorus makes you feel like an Olympic contender. It’s been ten years since the excesses of Big Beat, but The Go! Team have harvested all of the fun elements of that culture (happy samples, clunky rhythms, hands perpetually in the air) and made it digestible again.” – BBC Northern Ireland
The Go! crew is made up of an even split of men and women from a wide variety of nationalities, and the whole conglomerate is headed up by a teeny female MC named Ninja. They’re playing at the Paradise on November 1st, and I encourage you to check them out by hitting ZAP on Radio Pye in the left hand column. What a unique, wonderful, fun band these guys are.
Princess Magnolia Rodriguez Is Now Holding Court.
I was just sent a photo of Dee’s new kitten – the ridiculously regal Princess Magnolia Rodriguez! Welcome to our dysfunctional, booze-soaked, silly little family, Mags.
I never get sick of the kitten photographs. Bear with me, as I’m super busy today. I will get to Wadio after returning from seeing Chris Elliott host a screening of Cabin Boy at the Coolidge tonight. Hey – the kitten is filler, but it’s cute ass filler.
North End Noise Complaints Continued.
Yesterday’s Globe had a detailed article relaying the meeting I attended last week about late night noise in the North End. If you’re a local or have been to one of my prehistoric roofdeck parties and remember some of the drama – it’s worth a read. If you’re wondering why I have lingere ads up on the gallery page I just linked to, it’s because that stupid page gets over a thousand hits a day as a result of the thong photo at the bottom. I probably owe bum-royalties.
Remember – the next big bender is almost upon us. The Big Haunt 2 takes place out in Concord on October 29th. If you’re not on the Evite, email me and I’ll see that you’re added quicker than Nicholson can axe his way through a hotel door.
Don Lennon Live!
“As the Jerry Seinfeld of songwriters, Lennon makes singing about nothing sound downright philosophical. If he didn’t sing in such a deadpan way, you probably wouldn’t get the joke; if he didn’t play such catchy melodies, you wouldn’t want to get it.”
Don Lennon will be live on MIT’s radio station tonight at 9pm. WMBR streams live on the web and Don will be playing songs from his new album, Routine, plus undoubtedly a few older favorites. And don’t forget – he also plays live this Friday night at The Milky Way in Jamaica Plain. Starts at 9pm and will run you 7 bucks. You can get there in 10 minutes from the Stony Brook stop on the Orange Line. A little train ride, a little walkie, a little Lennon. See you there.
God Bless The Frat Pack.
I accidentally found this site today whilst searching for interesting podcasts. Dedicated to the newly-christened Frat Pack (Owen and Luke Wilson, Vince Vaughn, Ben Stiller, Will Ferrell and most recently Steve Carell) it’s a great source of news and info on these Midas-esque buddies who have successfully brought the R-Rated comedy back from the dead.
I made my own little 15 minute Photoshop for the boys as a tribute. The group has its kernels, and group has its chaffe – but collectively they’ve given me a lot of joy over the last few years. The site’s creator traces the origins of the new pack back 10 years to The Cable Guy, and here’s to many more. Ring-a-ding-ding. Then you fuck the plant.
Monday’s Quotelet: Little Monkey Nipples.
As if getting the lion’s share of the looks wasn’t enough – Johnny’s twin brother wanted both of the pacifiers, too.
Who Has My Trailer Park Boys DVDs?
It doesn’t pay to be free and easy with your DVD lending as I am coming to learn. Actually I already knew that, so I guess I’m just a mark. Since just about everyone who may have been at my apartment at one time or another also reads this blog, who in the heck has my Seasons 1,2 & 3 Trailer Park Boys DVDs? The individual I thought had them swears he doesn’t, so either he is a lying liarson, or someone else is currently playing the ‘borrow something and forget to give it back’ game. I’m a simple man, but I do need those back in order to be truly happy. So please give (back) generously.
Friday’s Quizzlet: Under House-Sitting Arrest.
Appetizer: Name 3 qualities that are important to you in friendship.
Non-conditional assurance is my favorite quality by far. I love being able to call someone up and ask them – “Realistically, how much of an ass did I make out of myself last night?” And then getting a reply somewhere along the lines of “I don’t think anyone even noticed your latex mask or the circus midget, so relax.” I have a few friends who will deny everything, and then I have a few friends who’ll make sure it’s all on film.
Soup: If you could dream about anything tonight, what would the subject be?
I’d settle for a good night’s sleep, period. I haven’t dreamed (or remembered dreams) in 10 years. When I was younger, I had a recurring dream that I was Spiderman. When I’d wake up, after swinging around the city and battling Rhino, I’d be so disappointed. Especially since I’d have usually shot “webbing” all over my sheets.
Salad: Do you usually personally thank people who do favors for you?
Absolutely. Because I’m a user, and I want them to continue to do things for me for a long time. I find that pink rose stationary with a lipstick mark and a wax seal tends to work the best.
Main Course: If you were out of town, who would you ask to housesit?
I have a couple of roomates, one who is never home and one who kicks the door off its frame when he forgets his keys. So I’d need to outsource. What about a sitting service manned by people under house arrest? Local law enforcement could oversee it. They have to house sit responsibly, because they’ll have ankle bracelets alerting the cops to shoot to kill if they leave the premesis. Don’t forget to water the plants.
Dessert: How do you react to practical jokes when they’re played on you?
I think I’m having one played on me right now. I waited all morning for some company to come fix my washer & dryer. I called them around 2 to ask where they were, and it turns out the technician had called in sick for the day – yet never actually called anybody. I told the woman he didn’t really call in sick then. Hopefully, he’s now ‘called in unemployed’.
Charming Neighborhood Or Demographic Trainwreck?
“And I wish guns were legal, because if they were…” – North End resident recounting her most recent measured exchange with a late-night party animal.
I was asked to attend a community meeting which took place tonight in the North End of Boston. As a six-year resident of my building, and the new manger, it was fascinating to be on the other side of the fence. You see, I am a reformed pain in the neck. The problems I used to create are now my problems. The neighbors I used to dismiss are now my peers. “In the old days we’d handle this sort of shit ourselves. But now if we do anything we get arrested or sued!” I’m definitely not longing for a return to the North End’s ‘good old days’ but things gots to change. I’ll elaborate.
Standing room only (300 people), it reminded me of an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting – disorganized, volatile, held in the basement of a church and smelling of coffee. Actually, I’ve never been to an AA meeting and I mean no disrespect. I’m just talking out of my liver. Still it was fun times, and I sincerely wish I had it all on tape – It was comedy, it was drama and I actually emphathized with everone. They were tired, exasperated and at their wit’s end. This has become a real epidemic and I could not believe some of the stories I heard. “Hello, my name is John and I live at 87 Richmond Street. I hate all drunk college kids and non-responsive police.” The F-word was used by senior citizens more than once. As were fists to stifle laughter (maybe just mine), but there weren’t too many them smiling.
Apparently Menino (there were members of his staff there) has nicknamed the North End “Disneyland” because he’s been getting so many party complaints. The complaints extended to condo owners, rental building landlords, foot traffic, street traffic, motorcycles and especially businesses that are open late. None of the authority figures or community leaders who attended were safe. The room complained about the cops, 911 response times, the mayor, Universities, etc. There were photographers there, one of whom looked pretty official (Globe maybe), and I am in all of the pictures, so look for me if there is an accompanying story. I’m the 6″4, UK mutt trying to remain inconspicuous in the background.
The residents in attendance ranged from Salem, Hanover, North Margin, Cooper, Sheafe – streets from all over the neighborhood. Some of the stories they told – fights, threats from young kids, flashlights shone and rocks thrown at the windows of people who complained, drunk women flashing, people claiming they didn’t have to shut down their party because they were secret service, bands on roofdecks at 2am, drugs – were hard to believe.
The people who were trying to lead the meeting ended it after about an hour and a half because it became little more than a gripe fest and forum for people to tell yet another “someone’s gonna get murdered some night” story. But progress was made, and it ended with more applause for the attending police reps than jeers. Action items from the city include foot patrols between 2-4 a.m. for the next few weeks, and cooperation from surrounding Universities. Also, the police are going to be following up on a long list of recently problematic buildings.
If police have to show up twice to the same address, all tenants will be arrested. They are really not joking around and I advise my North End readers to take this seriously. One of the officers said that they would be using the same sorts of tactics they’ve used to effectively shut down prostitution in other parts of the city. It was intense in that crowded little room.
Snuggling With The Spiders.
I sat down to write something brilliant and inspired last night to post today – and Blogger was down for maintenance. So you’re getting table scraps on this lovely Thursday, I’m afraid. Work has been beyond hectic lately, but I am determined to “keep ‘er goin” on PITF or die trying. Here are a few questions I’ve been mulling over this week. Feel free to answer me, or otherwise extrapolate:
– In client services, is it normal to have to react to so many things that you never get a chance to be proactive and head problems off at the pass before they ever become problems?
– Why do self-professed ‘dog people’ always hate cats, and yet ‘cat people’ just prefer cats to dogs? And is everyone’s gay-dar currently going off like a three alarm fire having just observed me asking that question?
– Do movie studios not realize that placing unskippable trailers at the beginning of DVDs defeats the purpose of having bought the DVD in the first place? Does actually leaving one’s apartment on a Saturday also defeat that purpose?
– Do the homeless have no strategy whatsoever? If I am asked for money, and am assured in the same breath that it is for food only – and I then offer to buy them some food instead – and then they get angry – does it then make sense to give me the same line of crap the next day, or even when I am on my way back home that very same afternoon? The homeless gameplan as I understand it is… actually I’ll save that for it’s own article.
Wednesday Wadio: Tom Vek’s C-C (You Put The Fire In Me).
“Tom Vek must have been beaten by lead guitar lines as a kid– he avoids them like a sore subject.” – Pitchfork
A friend turned me on to a 24 year old Brit apparently poised to become one of the next darlings of the indie rock scene. She does this on a regular basis, and I’m rarely that impressed. When I heard the first 30 seconds of “You Put The Fire In Me” however, I knew that Tom Vek was a little slice of something special. Not surprisingly, no one seemed to notice my violent air-drumming as I walked through Government Center with it blaring on my iPod only this morning. His debut abum, We Have Sound has been warmly received on both sides of the pond. And on my iPod.
“Most of Tom Vek’s influences are at least fifteen years old and easily triangulated. But he’s unencumbered by nostalgia. We Have Sound is so difficult to isolate from Vek’s ass-backwards charisma, I wonder if the man might be a visionary.” – Dusted Magazine
In addition to his youth it’s also worth pointing out that Vek plays all of his own insturments – of which there are many. This tune includes what sounds like an old-fashioned church organ, a more traditional piano tinkle layered in quietly as background texture and then hammering drums that sound as though they’re being played by Sloth. See what you think by hitting ZAP on Radio Pye in the left hand column.