Pop Culture Blog: Music, Movie and Humor

Leveraging low-hanging synergies outside the vertical fruit box since 1999.

The Departed Dildo.


in Movies

Last Friday as I was walking home from work, Anthony Anderson and his crew walked right past me in front of the godforsaken Alley on Boylston street. Being a big fan of The Shield, and an even bigger fan of Kangaroo Jack, I was pretty psyched. His career has taken an incredible leap this year – going from the dregs of… uh, Kangaroo Jack, to the reason he’s gracing us with his presence here in Beantown. Namely, a starring role in Scorcese’s next film, The Departed, which is currently filming in Southie and other locations around the city. A secondary-unit was shooting a scene in a North End restaurant a block from my apartment Tuesday night.

Anthony’s co-star is Jack Nicholson, among many others, and old Irish has more than lived up to his deviant reputation so far during the production: “Jack suggested using a [prosthetic appendage],” adds the source. “He also wanted to dust the [posterior] of one of the actresses with cocaine. Marty said, ‘Go for it!’” This old dog can still hunt. Oh – and birth calves from the looks of it.

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AFI’s Top 100 Movie Quotes Mockery.


in Movies

“Stop your grinnin’ and drop your linen!” – AFI has finally released their top 100 movie quotes of all time. And while Aliens didn’t really make the list, they’ve still done a decent job with a difficult task. But obviously I’m still going to fly into a silly snit and point out some glaring absences. It’s what I do/why I will die alone.

– Roy Batty’s pre-death speech from the end of Blade Runner. “I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe…” Hard to believe those tights either, Rutger.
– Indiana’s Jones’ cocky “Trust me” from Raiders of the Lost Ark. Love it.
– Choose any 10 second snippet from Glengarry Glen Ross you like and jam it in at #50. Mamet should be all over this list. “How was her crumbcake? Homemade?”
– You may also remember a small, seldom seen, independant movie called Goodfellas that could populate the first half of this list all by itself.

I’m a busy boy today and can’t really elaborate to the depressingly fanatical extent I’d like to. Please help me out and give a little love to the plethora of quotelets that have fallen by the wascally wayside.

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The Ghost of Cincos Past.


in Heartwarming

I’m donating my old work desktop to an intern next week, and decided it was high time to clean some of my legacy MP3s and photos off of it. Or “cover my tracks” as someone with a flair for the accurate would probably say. As I dug through nearly 2 years of emails and hundreds of photos, I found a few worth firing up to the new gallery. Since many of you have been enjoying it to date, here’s the quick, straight, poopy dope…

I found a ton of great photos from 2004’s Cinco de Mayo party, or Cinco de Quatro as it became known, that I don’t think anyone’s ever seen. You’ll remember that night if you were there – a crowded, boozy evening at Tiernan’s which ended in extreme violence. But it was still better than this year’s feeble attempt. My Cinco parties have run their course and gone to the big hacienda in the sky.

A few additions to the homeless revelry section were in order. The only common theme in this album being severe alcohol abuse – Highlights include the 2004 Boston Wine Expo, Frank N’ Stein’s this past Christmas with the Guelph boys, BHP nonsense and me trying to cling to heterosexuality somewhere in the South End.

And finally the I Like Having Friends section has some new life breathed into it courtesy of Colangelo, more Herb, Beyonce Knowles (seriously), and the rarely seen tender side of JJV. Why are you putting so much work into the galleries, Dave? – glad you asked. It will all make sense soon enough. To date, the gallery has added nearly 1000 pages to the davepye.com domain – all of which will eventually be spidered by search engines… and all of which will eventually have advertising on them. I love the gallery, but there’s a method to the percieved madness. Enjoy.

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Children Of The Granola.


in

My first reaction when I see someone handing things out for free in the middle of Government Center is “Oh Jesus, here we go again” – and this morning I was right on the ball. Because on this of all mornings, the bearded-bugger wanted me to have a snack, apparently.

A nice young lady approached me and asked, “Would you like a free granola bar, sir?” You’re goddamn right I did, so I accepted and watched her pull one out of the tasty little things out of her dirty handbag. She kept rooting around inside for something else, produced what looked like a business card and then handed me both. “Damn it!” I thought. Why does Granola always have strings attached? And raisins?

The card was for a nearby church, and the granola bar was chocolate chip instead of raisin. So the morning, while morose, grey and rainy, took and unexpected upswing and I quickly thanked our lord and savior for the divine confection. But I was immediately reminded of an old movie I used to love about over-zealous religion and food. And by the time I finally remembered Jonestown, forget it – I’d already snarfed down the delicious bastard and then immediately began having hypochondriacal-cyanide-stomach-pains.

“He wants a chocolate chip one too, Malachy. He wants a chocolate chip one too.”

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Something New, Something Doyle, Something Blue.


in

Congrats to Jen & Brian who just recently tied the knot up in Penn Yan, New York. To say that my favorite little tulip looked lovely would be an understatement – and Jen looked pretty good, too. Best of luck with your happy weddingness, pickety fences, childrenlets and all sorts of other major life milestones of which I have absolutely no comprehension.

I think Jen is definitely Doyle’s greatest match since Carrie got cancelled and Jerry shuffled off this mortal coil. Seriously – best wishes for a happy, togethernessy, monogamicious and matrimonious lifetime together.

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