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Pop Culture Blog: Music, Movie and Humor

Pop Culture Blog: Music, Movie and Humor

Leveraging low-hanging synergies outside the vertical fruit box since 1999.

Barack Obama: My Reservations Explained

by admin on November 4, 2008
in Politics

Here’s something you never thought you’d read here: Senator Barack Obama seems like a very “good” man to me and I wish him the best of luck. His intent is solid, most of his propositions reasonable, he’s a charismatic speaker and his meteoric rise to popularity (and in my opinion the new President-Elect by this time tomorrow) has been nothing short of remarkable. I was asked recently when interviewed for a radio show here in Canada, “Don’t you think the individual with the most public support should be President?” I thought about it and reluctantly answered, “No.”

Should Fall Out Boy unsurp The Pixies as my favorite rock group because they’ve sold four times as many records in a quarter of the time? Had I been present at Jonestown, should I have chugged the poisonous Kool-Aid like everyone else did? Again, “No.” I have a brain in my head, my own set of values, what I like to consider a formidable amount of common sense and I won’t be spoon-fed. Ever. Regardless of how I may admire some some aspects of the man and his mission, there is no doubt in my mind that his Presidency in 2009 is a bad idea. 8 more years from now, bring him on. At the present time he’s a boy band with the support of millions of rubes who frankly shouldn’t be voting due to their completely uninformed reasons for doing so. Obama isn’t a messiah, he’s an inexplicable fad with a slick marketing department that figured out how to reach and inspire people that usually have their thumbs so far up their ass on election day that it’s tough to work the XBox controller.

I hate to simply run down a list of facts that you’ve read/heard in several hundred places before. It’s likely the last warm day of the fall, however, and I’m going to be spending most of it outside working on things that absolutely have to get done before the first freeze – and must get cracking. These are ‘facts’ by the way. Indisputable and in no way spin or a stretch. I know his record well and have been watching him for 4 years now. These are the specific reasons that I, a self-respecting, somewhat intelligent and very recent American citizen (one full year as of this Saturday) who pays a lot of attention to politics on a daily basis, 365 days a year, whether there is an election imminent or not – will not be voting for “The One”. They have nothing to do with the color of his skin, his middle name or even (believe it or not but I only consider myself a Conservative on international matters) his chosen party.

  • When a Senator is called to vote on any piece of legislature, she or he have 3 options: “Aye”, “Nay” or “Present”. When one votes the latter, they are effectively side-stepping the issue – in Obama’s case undoubtedly to avoid hurting his future chances at the White House. Sometimes Senators vote this way upon instructions from higher-ups in their party. Rarely. “Present” is an option Obama invoked nearly 130 times as a state senator. Way to lead the charge, Barack. Being the leader of a country – yes, even the most powerful one in the world – requires one trait above all others. The ability to make decisions.
  • The blatant way in which the majority of the media absolutely fawned over the man is not my opinion, it’s a fact – the percentage of Time magazine covers given to Obama vs. McCain (12 to 5) in the past year just the tip of the iceberg which sticks in my craw. Undeniable, embarrassing and offensive to anyone’s intelligence.
  • Barack Obama has never been the Governor of a state, or the Mayor of a city. Or the Mayor of a town. Was his election to the Senate based on another form of experience equal to or surpassing the aforementioned “classics”? Not even close. He was an Illinois State Senator for 8 years and a U.S. Senator for a little over 1 year before he began to focus his attention on running for President practically full time. As if this whole shit show wasn’t weird enough, his opponent for U.S. Senator from Illinois in 2005 was rocked by a sex scandal during the race allowing Obama to waltz in virtually unopposed.
  • In his younger years, and likely still to this day behind closed doors, Obama was a very religious man. It’s well documented, even on his own website. You wouldn’t have known it during the last 12 months, and that sort of strategic hypocrisy surrounding something which is obviously so important to him leaves a very bad taste in my yapper. I am not an overly religious person, but I was raised Catholic and respect other people’s religious beliefs in a way that they will never be required to respect mine. Don’t get me started on that particular double-standard. This is about Barack. He has disowned, a relative term, his faith to improve his chances for President. Faith is a “big one” to be casting aside. What other paradigm shifts in his value system is he going to be able to justify?
  • Finally, the way in which the Democratic Party – which is supposed to stand for all of the forward-thinking, progressiveness and equality that the evil empire of the Republicans does not – has cannibalized itself leaves me absolutely revolted. Barack supporters and party leaders who weighed the likelihood of the two potential Democratic candidates alike, treated Hillary Clinton the same way they now treat the reviled Sarah Palin, specifically – as if she weren’t a woman. Obama is a Black man, but he is still a man. There are many, including myself, who feel that a woman winning the Presidency or Vice-Presidency is a far more historic event. Politics is never pretty, but the way in which Clinton’s own party – which she has served for almost a decade now – left her holding the cigar in favor of Obama speaks volumes to me. The way in which Obama supporters, especially female Obama supporters, have relegated both her and Palin to less-than-scum status confuses just slightly more than it frightens me.

If you’d like to refute or rebuke anything I’ve stated here you’re more than welcome. I’d appreciate it, however, if you actually try to prove me wrong on any of these points rather than mention that McCain is old or Palin is stupid. Tell me something I haven’t heard. Prove me wrong. I’m not going to spend the next 4 years – let’s be honest… unless New York City becomes a smoking crater prior to 2012, 8 years – sniping at Barack. I wish him well and I hope he is indeed capable of the sort of change he has inspired over half the nation simply pontificating about. It’s all just words, however, and unless Obama and Biden keep a close eye on our borders, our conspiring international foes and especially approach the future of Iraq in a far more realistic fashion than the majority of their party-mates, I absolutely shudder to think what we have to look forward to. Smoking craters.

Good luck to you, sir and I wish you the best. The economy and each and every domestic issue aside for a moment – you are inheriting the helm of a country which faces innumerable outside threats both diplomatically and off the established grid. I hope that you are able to exhibit measured wisdom well beyond your experience and 47 years. More than anything else, I hope that you never discount or underestimate the reality of tangible danger to American citizens (at home and abroad) the way in which so many of your party members have – effectively driving me across the aisle 8 years ago in spite of my domestic liberal leanings. I really mean that.

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The International Green Conspiracy

by admin on November 3, 2008
in Politics

Don’t get me wrong – I mean the notion of “going green” and saving the planet is an admirable one. In certain circumstances, maybe even most circumstances, companies and businesses that do so are actually taking tangible steps to reduce their strain on the environment. A business, however, is just that. They are here to make money above all else. A business that doesn’t exist to put smiles on the faces of their sharehoders is called a ‘charity’… and never the tween shall meet.

So when an entity claims they are about to “go green” they shouldn’t just be added to a list of eco-friendly companies or to your family’s favorite places to shop. They should explain in excrutiating detail exactly what they are doing, adding, removing or changing to warrant the classification. This is a new phenomenon. Definitions and standards are vague at best. And here’s the other important thing…

“Going Green” is the single biggest marketing ploy in the history of advertising. Ploy might not be the best word. Upheavel, gimmick, scheme and several other words come to mind. Picture a boardroom full of any company’s executive management. “Alright fellows…” the hypothetical CEO in question begins, “how do we go green?”. Start there, and realize that same conversation is taking place at every company under the sun that isn’t already making hemp ice cream. They don’t care how they reach the new holy grail of advertising lingo, even if it’s a square peg in a round hole. Just as long as they do.

I am so sick and tired of hearing about companies “going green” that I felt compelled to point the potential deceptions out to anyone who hadn’t already figured it out for themselves. Again, the notion is a wonderful, admirable thing. But take these claims with a grain of salt. Otherwise you and several thousand other lemmings will end up patronizing green whaling vessel repairmen and environmentally-friendly strip mining operations. Remember, the color green is also frequently associated with naivety – and you may well end up being the silly goose that “goes” there.

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Rhubard and Shepherd are Almost a Year Old!

by admin on October 29, 2008
in Animalistic

Rhubarb and Shepherd were born in late November, 2007 in Kingston Ontario. But their first birthday party will be held the Tuesday night before Thanksgiving in Boston, MA. If you’re a family friend we’d love for you to come and join us as myself and Shepherd (obviously) will both be in town and anxious to see people.

boston-terrier-birthday

The party is VERY kid-friendly so snacks, juice and gift bags will be available. However it’s still a Pye Party, so beer and wine will be flowing long after the children have left and probably long before they’ve left to be fair. Help us celebrate this special day and prime your pumps for the big holiday at the same time.

Presents for the pooches are welcomed and encouraged! Sweaters, treats, toys and anything else you may dream up are all great ideas. And if anyone can dig up the Dog Indiana Jones Costume that was sold out everywhere I looked online – Shep really had his hopes up for that one. Hope to see you there, and that nobody calls the ASPCA! If you would like to come, send me an email or Facebook message where there is also an Event page for the evening.

Signed: Dave and Janet – Proud siblings and parents of siblings (No, this party isn’t actually taking place in Kentucky).

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Monday’s Quotelet: Boss & Shep – New Best Buddies?

by admin on October 28, 2008
in Monday's Quotelet

P1000443
“Remember – you’re both playing to decide who gets more attention today and who gets to sleep in Dave’s bed tonight. Question #2 – True or False: Dave likes it when you sleep on his feet so he can’t roll over.”

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Crazy Fall Follies, Part 2

by admin on October 22, 2008
in Travels

Are you sitting comfortably? Then I’ll continue…

Sunday we all picked up and drove back to our respective homes. The departure was anything but early and I got back to Portland, to an extremely psyched puppy, by about 10pm. It was great to be home, but the odyssey wasn’t quite over. I was supposed to drive to Michigan to Mike and Kelly’s wedding the following Friday, but I bowed out and the couple were very cool about it. It was just too far, too soon. I really, really wanted to be there, but I was shattered. I also had something else I really needed to get done which I moved up to that weekend.

Shep-and-Bella

Gratuitous recent photo of Shep and Bella. Because I can.

Reiner is my first cousin and although I hadn’t seen him in 4 years, we’ve remained very close. It’s one of those relationships where you don’t really have to work hard to maintain it – it just is. It’s a family thing, after all. Reiner had been home from Spain for nearly 3 weeks by the time I finally got to see him. The deal was thus – “I drive to Hamilton and pick you up, take you to Burlington, you help move me out of my uber-expensive storage locker there and then drive a UHaul back to Portland while I’m in my car in front of you. In return I build you a 3d graphic designer (pause for the cause) website, entertain you in the country for a few days, drive you back to Hamilton and to top it off you get a 60 gig iPod“. Pretty good arrangement if I do say so myself.

We had a blast in the process – it was insanely good to see him and was like no time had passed. I hope to go visit him in Spain, maybe for a sort of spring break, and he has promised to come back to Canada about every six months to see his family. Our eventual return to Hamilton – after two long car rides spent listening primarily to the Magnetic Fields , Beta Band and Joy Division – was timed perfectly with Canadian Thanksgiving! We rolled in on the Thursday and stayed up until 3am with his parents (my Aunt Susan and Uncle Heinz) drinking, smoking and talking on their back deck. Yes, the extended Pye family likes to smoke. It’s like being in a Hemingway novel most of the time.

The late night conversation got pretty emotional, as we discussed my father and several other extremely juicy tidbits of family history I had absolutely no clue existed. In addition to stories about my father specifically, which knocked my socks off on a couple of occasions, I learned the truth about his father and uncles – who apparently ran the rackets in Hamilton during the 20’s/30’s and shipped rum and whiskey down to the USA during prohibition. They were all very large men and two-fisted drinkers and gamblers the lot. I also learned that my father’s mother’s father – who I’d always thought of as my “British Grandfather”, was actually born in Ireland. This brings my family ancestry, with the exception of my mother’s father Jimmy who was Scottish, to almost 100% Irish. As recently as 3 years ago I was under the impression that I was primarily Scotch/English. In reality… I think I’m a mick! My House of Pain and Pogues obsessions make perfect sense now! I need to call Kent.

tg4

“Thanks, but we’re set. We have 3 prostitutes back at the house.”

Friday night we went to Toronto to hit a birthday party. I managed to convince the illustrious JV to come with us, and we spent most of the night being silly and having fun. He actually said to me at one point, “Dave, stop making jokes about that girl – she’s gonna hear you. We’re too old for this shit.” I was momentarily concerned. The king of the ball-busters is telling me to lay off my brilliant “she has knees like fucking Bill Laimbeer” jokes because we’re adults? I immediately asked if his wife Amy was pregnant – and she isn’t. So what was afoot? My fears about Jason suddenly turning into Danny Glover were thankfully dashed half-an-hour later when he tuned his back to a guy and girl who were totally smushing me against the wall for no reason and walked backwards, imitating their drunk conversation until he has pushed them about 3 feet away from me. “Hey man! You’re an asshole,” they screamed. “I know” he replied. And all was right with the world.

tg15

Reiner and Dave kept their Uncle Richard in stitches. And concerned for his safety.

Saturday was the big family dinner at Aunt Susan’s and we arrived around 2pm strapped with our assigned foodstuffs – 6 bottles of red, pumpkin and bumbleberry pie, olive oil mayo, salad fixings and 2 cases of beer. I hooked up my PS3 for the kiddies – OK, me and Reiner – and slowly the family started to arrive. Aunt Rose, Uncle Richard, Kathy, Erynn, Chris and my “little” cousins Thomas, Christopher, Seth and Jakob were also on hand. It was a wonderful afternoon and I really needed it. Everyone asked about Gordo, and even more stories I hadn’t heard emerged. Particularly from Dad’s older brother Richard, with whom he shared a bedroom for many years. I think I will have to save them all for a separate post. Anyhew, the food was delicious, the laughs long and hard and we ended the evening with a viewing of the woefully underrated and insanely hilarious StepBrothers .

Sunday we drove back to Portland after picking up a friend’s Grandparents on the way back. Grandma started telling me a story about World War 2 (they are Latvian) and paused before admitting that she talks a lot. I said if you’re going to talk about history and specifically WW2, feel free to talk my ear off. I heard tales of Nazis fighting Russians in the fields of her father’s farm while they hid and watched, and was thoroughly engrossed as she continued to describe their desperate flight to England and then finally Canada in 1956. It made the 4 hour trip go so much faster, and she even brought sandwiches and cookies!

tg19

“One last shot of Jaegar and I’m cannonballing into the lake.”

That evening my Mother and I were invited to the Abele’s house for another round of incredible food. Turkey was once again the order of the day, and the Eastern European influences to the meal made the bird seem like a completely fresh notion. The awesome view of the Big Rideau in the background didn’t hurt, and they even had us back the next day for lamb. But much was to transpire before Monday, and it was to get a little bit crazy before my 7-week odyssey finally drew to a close.

tgx10

“This will almost make up for all the errant charges to our credit cards over the summer.”

Vilis got a call around 8:30pm which saw the local bar, which is part of a marina and closes for the winter, inviting us all down to help polish off the perishable liquor stock. We thought about taking the boat but finally decided to scoot over in the Charger where we met Dawson, Shane and a bunch of my other new local friends. After polishing off a few half-finished bottles of wine, Vilis decided to invite the whole lot of us, staff included, for a bonfire on his soon to be developed 36 acres of beautiful property – which happens to be around the corner from my house – and the night went late. Very, very late. When I finally crawled back to their house for lamb around 2:30 Monday afternoon – I wanted to take my own life with baby laxatives. What a capper to a truly exhausting, enjoyable, heart-warming and necessary month-and-a-half long journey.

tgx

Throwing the can of boat gas on the lit match was a bad idea. But sometimes, bad ideas work.

This last weekend was the first in 7 weeks that I was actually at home, and it was lovely. However the dock still needs to come out of the lake, the boat has to be winterized – as does the Winchester. I have my work cut out for me for a while yet. But I’ll be home, and that’s always time well spent. Even if I’m up to my waist in freezing lake water with one foot cut to ribbons by zebra mussels. It’s my lake. They’re my zebra mussels. And it’s Oktoberfest Night at the cove this Saturday. I’ll raise a stein and be just fine. I’d better start resting up for American Thanksgiving as I plan to drive down to Boston again to partake. Will it ever end? No – and I thank Christ for that, everyday. Friends and family are why I get out of bed in the morning.

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