First things first – How the hell did I not know until last night that the Verve’s first album in 11 years was released on Tuesday? I have failed myself, and I have failed all of you. Or something. Sufferin’ Ashcrofts this album is actually really, really good. I want to gush like a schoolgirl but I’m only on my second listen and I want to remain reasonably objective and not just a spoon-fed fan boy. Who am I kidding? I’ll be weeping giddily in a corner by listen number 6.

The last time we saw Richard Ashcroft, he was obliviously battering pedestrians in the video for the 99% universally loved and frickin’ incredible Bittersweet Symphony. The other 1% consisted only of members of the Rolling Stones who sued the pants off of them for allegedly lifting the famous (thanks to The Verve) violin hook off an old track of theirs. I don’t remember how that all turned out, and I really don’t care, because the band made that riff their own and created one of the most memorable songs and albums of the 1990’s.

I was living in England when Urban Hymns was released and we listened to it every single night during clean-ups and lock-ins at the pub where I was working. The record is like a time machine for me, and I can’t believe they have been silent ever since. Haven’t been this excited about a new record release in a very long time and it’s good to have the original lineup reunited and recording. I hope the whole experience isn’t, well, bittersweet for their fans.

The album is their 4th full length in an almost 20-year career technically and is entitled “Forth“. A nice little play on words, don’t you think? The video I am embedding is for the first single, Love is Noise, and is awash with odd sound effects and background noises that may put some off at first. The tune tends to really grow on you and has been well-received by reviewers and festival goers in the U.K. all summer. When you come back and headline Glastonbury after an 11-year absence as The Verve did just last month, you are loved. And there’s a reason.

I am desperately trying to get my crippled blog back into fighting form – I appreciate you all bearing with me and I have someone working on the technical issues. In the meantime I’ll fire out a few blurbs that have been on my mind.

• The Denver DNC: I haven’t seen cannibalism like this since that wonderful movie about the Uruguayan rugby team crashing in the Andes. Keep it up, Dems. Please.
• The last long weekend of the summer is ahead, I have more work to do than I care to think about, and I’m still trying to keep this blog moving along. Am I in possession of a labor of love – or severely cockeyed priorities? I’m not entirely sure.
• Has there ever been a porn movie called “Cockeyed”? Note to self, call Larry Flynt.
• When looking over my bank statements today and feeling temporarily optimistic I suddenly remembered the pontoon I bent whilst hitting a sneaky rock with the boat. Bye bye disposable income for September.
• The new boat will be named “Pyeseas 2” after the original “Pyeseas” which was the 25-foot cabin cruiser my father restored all by himself when I was a little kid. The words “Pye” and “seas” are self explanatory, but my father is also a Pisces, and I believe it was my Aunt Susan who came up with the name back in the mid-eighties when Dad tasked family and friends with devising the perfect name.
• A longer post about my Dad’s current situation will follow after all the blog glitches have been remedied.
• This winter will be about buckling down, reviving those dusty side-projects which I feel are still worthwhile and putting money in the bank. And skidooing. Note to Gooch: Get those fucking sleds up here pronto, Gooch.
• I now have 5 weddings to go to in September. Yes, you heard me correctly, 5. Better reschedule the whole ‘buckling down financially’ thing to October.

That last point has left me so exasperated that the only way to cheer myself up is to now go back to work – so you know it’s bad. I am actually looking forward to each and every single one of the joyous occasions, but I won’t lie – I’ve been crying myself to sleep.

Scaley quicky realized that the stranger who sold him the river map could never again be trusted.

You know me – All the giant squid news that’s fit to print. A few months back I mentioned my excitement surrounding the monstrous giant squid corpse that was being studied in New Zealand. They’ve recently released a few findings and apparently this particular squidizen (see what I did there?) was not the Nautalis-crushing super-predator the scientists were expecting. The best bits:

• Not the T-Rex of the oceans but a lethargic blob.
• An overweight breeding machine.
• Probably quite docile when alive.
• A strange phenomenon that has caught scientists off guard.
• As she got older she got shorter and broader.
• Too gelatinous to have been a fighting machine.
• Have a penchant for toothfish, are no strangers to cannibalism.

Have the scientists considered that Rosie O’Donnell might have been in a windsurfing accident somewhere in the vicinity? This certainly doesn’t sound like the mighty giant squid of lore. Take out the “breeding machine” bullet and its Rosie right down to the toothfish. I need coffee.

I’m starting to warm up a little to my once, and now again, Ottawa-area home. I was initially of the opinion that no reasonably decent bands or comedians ever stopped here, and I’ve been proven wrong several times this past summer. Last month I went and saw Chris Rock play at the National Arts Center downtown, and I just found out that both Oasis and Neil Young are playing between now and the end of the year. Both are acts I’ve always wanted to see for posterity’s sake, and I might just get myself some tickets to see the brothers Gallagher when they play here in a little under 3 weeks.

Oasis has always been a guilty pleasure of mine. I say ‘guilty’ because they’ve been a little more ‘uber-popular’ in their lifetime than most of the bands I listen to. Then again, I’m typing as a guy who’s seen U2 in concert 3 times now. So my cover is blown and I might as well come clean. I love the music, occasionally emulate the unwarranted bravado and giggle at Liam’s many ridiculous booze and coke-fueled antics. Particularly his parenting.

My favorite Oasis tune has always been Supersonic, followed closely by Some Might Say, seen above. If this doesn’t work, I can always go see Method Man and Redman on September 27th. Maybe Ottawa is the only place left in Canada any of these folks is still allowed to play anymore? Neil Young excluded, of course. In Ottawa he’s practically the mayor. Any other secret Oasis fans out there? Plead your case.