When I first met the Monster, he was only 23 and enjoyed reminding me that I was pushing 30. Old-timer and Grandpa were terms oft-used to describe me, and there were many jokes based around Depends. Well the big galoot turns 26 today, and I take extreme pleasure in welcoming him to the second half of his fleeting twenties.
Happy birthday big guy. You test my nerves at times but you’re a good friend. I’d offer to buy you a drink, but you’re probably already sucking down a bottle of Petron in an IHOP somewhere. We’ll meet up tonight for a few quiet ones, and I’ll do my best to keep you out of the clutches of the Salem police. But I’m not making any promises.
Squeel like a pig on your Birthday Monsta!!!!
Happy birthday!
Posted by doyle
Thanks Dave – much appreciated!
Posted by Bryan Whitely
Happy Bday old man from the boys back in the sixth section…cant wait til the next tour through boston…be safe tonite
Posted by squid
Happy B-Day Whitely! I guess I will see you this weekend since it sounds like you will be back in Woo. Talk to you later.
Dan Welker
Posted by Dan Welker
Happy birthday you gross bastard. Hope to see you this weekend to set it off..
Posted by steckmime
To a wicked pissa of a guy….HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Posted by A.
Age 26, who would’ve thunk it! I think everyone had you bowing out from this wonderful place a long time ago! And welcome to the age where people think you are creapy for staring at an 18 year old. Happy birthday man.
Posted by bodle
Ah yes, the birthday of that creepy, blood-thirsty monster Whitely. I remember Whitely, the wizard of nut tricks, scaring poor kids with the chicken heart and other sac acrobatics. Nonsense. back to the task at hand… Hopefully i’ll see you soon whitley and we can revert back to being wasteoid, googly eyed fools and listen to some weird music. Happy birthday.
Posted by zamborsky
Happy Birthday Rickey,
You better stay away from my daughter you son of a bitch!
Posted by Mr. Lahey
Some of you may not know this, but the scriptures came true 26 years ago today. The Beast was born into this world for the sole pourpose of the destruction of mankind. Few of you know that the Beast walks among you under the guise of Whitemonster. Luckily for us Whitemonster can be distracted from his doomsday destiny, but only with your help. The only way to keep the Whitemonster satisfied is by supplying him with massive amounts of cheap tequilla, and then letting him drop the HF on some poor unsuspecting fat and/or old skank. Happy birthday Monster. Enjoy yourself tonight, happy hunting, and remember, sometimes, a good batwing is all it takes to convince her to come home with ya.
Posted by George
Best B-Day Ever! Thanks guys and Thank You SideBar!
Posted by Bryan Whitely