Pop Culture Blog: Music, Movie and Humor
Leveraging low-hanging synergies outside the vertical fruit box since 1999.
I was just sent a photo of Dee’s new kitten – the ridiculously regal Princess Magnolia Rodriguez! Welcome to our dysfunctional, booze-soaked, silly little family, Mags.
I never get sick of the kitten photographs. Bear with me, as I’m super busy today. I will get to Wadio after returning from seeing Chris Elliott host a screening of Cabin Boy at the Coolidge tonight. Hey – the kitten is filler, but it’s cute ass filler.
Yesterday’s Globe had a detailed article relaying the meeting I attended last week about late night noise in the North End. If you’re a local or have been to one of my prehistoric roofdeck parties and remember some of the drama – it’s worth a read. If you’re wondering why I have lingere ads up on the gallery page I just linked to, it’s because that stupid page gets over a thousand hits a day as a result of the thong photo at the bottom. I probably owe bum-royalties.
Remember – the next big bender is almost upon us. The Big Haunt 2 takes place out in Concord on October 29th. If you’re not on the Evite, email me and I’ll see that you’re added quicker than Nicholson can axe his way through a hotel door.
I accidentally found this site today whilst searching for interesting podcasts. Dedicated to the newly-christened Frat Pack (Owen and Luke Wilson, Vince Vaughn, Ben Stiller, Will Ferrell and most recently Steve Carell) it’s a great source of news and info on these Midas-esque buddies who have successfully brought the R-Rated comedy back from the dead.
I made my own little 15 minute Photoshop for the boys as a tribute. The group has its kernels, and group has its chaffe – but collectively they’ve given me a lot of joy over the last few years. The site’s creator traces the origins of the new pack back 10 years to The Cable Guy, and here’s to many more. Ring-a-ding-ding. Then you fuck the plant.
As if getting the lion’s share of the looks wasn’t enough – Johnny’s twin brother wanted both of the pacifiers, too.
Appetizer: Name 3 qualities that are important to you in friendship.
Non-conditional assurance is my favorite quality by far. I love being able to call someone up and ask them – “Realistically, how much of an ass did I make out of myself last night?” And then getting a reply somewhere along the lines of “I don’t think anyone even noticed your latex mask or the circus midget, so relax.” I have a few friends who will deny everything, and then I have a few friends who’ll make sure it’s all on film.
Soup: If you could dream about anything tonight, what would the subject be?
I’d settle for a good night’s sleep, period. I haven’t dreamed (or remembered dreams) in 10 years. When I was younger, I had a recurring dream that I was Spiderman. When I’d wake up, after swinging around the city and battling Rhino, I’d be so disappointed. Especially since I’d have usually shot “webbing” all over my sheets.
Salad: Do you usually personally thank people who do favors for you?
Absolutely. Because I’m a user, and I want them to continue to do things for me for a long time. I find that pink rose stationary with a lipstick mark and a wax seal tends to work the best.
Main Course: If you were out of town, who would you ask to housesit?
I have a couple of roomates, one who is never home and one who kicks the door off its frame when he forgets his keys. So I’d need to outsource. What about a sitting service manned by people under house arrest? Local law enforcement could oversee it. They have to house sit responsibly, because they’ll have ankle bracelets alerting the cops to shoot to kill if they leave the premesis. Don’t forget to water the plants.
Dessert: How do you react to practical jokes when they’re played on you?
I think I’m having one played on me right now. I waited all morning for some company to come fix my washer & dryer. I called them around 2 to ask where they were, and it turns out the technician had called in sick for the day – yet never actually called anybody. I told the woman he didn’t really call in sick then. Hopefully, he’s now ‘called in unemployed’.
“And I wish guns were legal, because if they were…” – North End resident recounting her most recent measured exchange with a late-night party animal.
I was asked to attend a community meeting which took place tonight in the North End of Boston. As a six-year resident of my building, and the new manger, it was fascinating to be on the other side of the fence. You see, I am a reformed pain in the neck. The problems I used to create are now my problems. The neighbors I used to dismiss are now my peers. “In the old days we’d handle this sort of shit ourselves. But now if we do anything we get arrested or sued!” I’m definitely not longing for a return to the North End’s ‘good old days’ but things gots to change. I’ll elaborate.
Standing room only (300 people), it reminded me of an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting – disorganized, volatile, held in the basement of a church and smelling of coffee. Actually, I’ve never been to an AA meeting and I mean no disrespect. I’m just talking out of my liver. Still it was fun times, and I sincerely wish I had it all on tape – It was comedy, it was drama and I actually emphathized with everone. They were tired, exasperated and at their wit’s end. This has become a real epidemic and I could not believe some of the stories I heard. “Hello, my name is John and I live at 87 Richmond Street. I hate all drunk college kids and non-responsive police.” The F-word was used by senior citizens more than once. As were fists to stifle laughter (maybe just mine), but there weren’t too many them smiling.
Apparently Menino (there were members of his staff there) has nicknamed the North End “Disneyland” because he’s been getting so many party complaints. The complaints extended to condo owners, rental building landlords, foot traffic, street traffic, motorcycles and especially businesses that are open late. None of the authority figures or community leaders who attended were safe. The room complained about the cops, 911 response times, the mayor, Universities, etc. There were photographers there, one of whom looked pretty official (Globe maybe), and I am in all of the pictures, so look for me if there is an accompanying story. I’m the 6″4, UK mutt trying to remain inconspicuous in the background.
The residents in attendance ranged from Salem, Hanover, North Margin, Cooper, Sheafe – streets from all over the neighborhood. Some of the stories they told – fights, threats from young kids, flashlights shone and rocks thrown at the windows of people who complained, drunk women flashing, people claiming they didn’t have to shut down their party because they were secret service, bands on roofdecks at 2am, drugs – were hard to believe.
The people who were trying to lead the meeting ended it after about an hour and a half because it became little more than a gripe fest and forum for people to tell yet another “someone’s gonna get murdered some night” story. But progress was made, and it ended with more applause for the attending police reps than jeers. Action items from the city include foot patrols between 2-4 a.m. for the next few weeks, and cooperation from surrounding Universities. Also, the police are going to be following up on a long list of recently problematic buildings.
If police have to show up twice to the same address, all tenants will be arrested. They are really not joking around and I advise my North End readers to take this seriously. One of the officers said that they would be using the same sorts of tactics they’ve used to effectively shut down prostitution in other parts of the city. It was intense in that crowded little room.
Good old Nipsey cashed in his chips Sunday afternoon. And since he’s brought me a lot of joy recentely via the Dean Martin Roast DVDs, I wanted to say a few words. His last public appearance was at the Aviator premiere a year ago, and I think you’ll agree he was looking pretty darn good for 80! But when ya gotta go, you gotta go. Funny bastard or no. I
In addition to being a prominent part of Dino’s crew in the 70’s, playing the Tin Man in The Wiz, starring on Car 54 Where are You? and hosting The Match Game after the legendary Charles Nelson Reilly departed, Nipsey was famous for his ‘poems’ – for lack of a better word.
Of this job, I don’t think so highly, But hey — it beats hangin’ out with Charles Nelson Reilly.
Almost a year to the day since I wrote my acclaimed homage de 20,000 Leagues, which still attracts traffic to my site on a daily basis, a Japanese scientist has finally managed to photograph a live Giant Squid in the wild. I think this is absolutely awesome, as I’ve been unhealthily fascinated with the beasts for 30 years. I have no defense or childhood trauma to link it back to. I won’t even eat a fishstick. That’s just the way it’s always been. My childhood was chock full of giant squids, Star Wars and Popeye Candy Cigarettes – and fully devoid of reason.
This photo released by Dr. Tsunemi Kubodera of the National Science Museum, a 26-foot-long Architeuthis attacks a prey hung by a white rope, left, at 900 yards deep off the coast of Japan’s Bonin islands, 1,000 kilometers (670 miles) south of Tokyo.
I don’t want to mislead anyone – so I’m gonna come clean and admit that I wasn’t actually in the original photo. That was just photoshopped in recently. But if I had been there, and was able to breathe 900 meters underwater without the aid of any scuba gear, that is how excited I would have been. It’s practically the equivalent of 100% scientific accuracy if we’re going to split hairs. Again, ladies – please form a line to the left.
So to all you skeptics and nay-sayers be dammned. The truth really is out there if you look hard enough. Next on my agenda – those frigging bastard Minotaurs.
“Live from New York, It’s Saturday Night…”
I suppose at this point I am officially championing a cause. I got Don‘s long awaited new CD in the mail yesterday, and was instantly smitten with the lead track, What SNL Stands For. I’m not sure what the hidden meaning is here. Maybe there isn’t one – unless Jimmy Fallon and Matt Damon are metaphors for something, which let’s face it is highly unlikely.
What I do know, is that this song is funny, catchy and great. Jangly guitars, a whack of echo, reverb and probably his most extensive vocal versatility to date. A lot of Don‘s friends and acquaintances visit this site, and I know they’re all anxious for a listen. So excuse the doubling up, but it has to be done. If you like what you hear, join us on October 14th for Don’s Boston show and click here to buy the CD.
I’ve added about 40 more photos from that wonderful Whistler weekend. Still no shots of the ceremony, so if you have some please send them my way. I’m talking to you, Heiss. There are a lot of similar shots, only more of the Concord kids than the Bauercrest this time around. Also, be sure to check out photos of JT and I bumming around Vancouver the day after the festivities, as well as PITF favorite (and current quotelet champion) Graeme with a meth-head on his lap. Albeit a hot one.
Have I mentioned how glad I am that this summer is over? I saw a leaf fall today. I shed a tear, and my wallet sighed audibly.
Got a second? Good. Want to see something funny? OK. Go to MSN. Are you there? Now type “outside sales calls” into the search box. Got it? Hit the search button. I have to screen-shot this as it’ll undoubtedly change soon. Anyway, for posterity’s sake:
In your face, U.S. Department of Labor. That’s for that time at summer camp you beat me in the sack race and then made out with my girlfriend behind the canteen.
Can someone please explain to me how in the heck I’m supposed to get any work done today when Death Hunt is on AMC? Mounties, trappers, gunfights, gold teeth being removed with hunting knives – and even Ed Lauter. Oh happy, unproductive Saturday. I guess there’s always tomorrow.
“Lennon’s fans love his farcical, enigmatic lyrics and his crystalline pop sensibility for what they are. And if he’s not yet a big name in his home town, he may soon be able to look forward to a wider audience in the Gulf region. As one reviewer writes on that populist arena of rock-crit discourse, Amazon.com (where Lennon’s three-album average is a solid 4.8 stars out of 5), “Play this CD for the people of Iraq and they would agree that the USA is good.” – The Boston Phoenix
If a little Lennon is all we need as an endgame for Iraq, we should be able to wrap it all up by this time next week. Anyhew, I hate Dave Matthews. But that’s not why I like this song. Nor do I like it for a certain aforementioned reasons which were touched upon yesterday. Rather, I love Really Dave Matthews because in addition to themes of loneliness, awkward youth and autumn, it’s a practical example of the insane lengths intelligent males will go to to get their noodles wet.
When Don Lennon’s 3rd album, Downtown, got reviewed by Pitchfork and the Village Voice, it was a special day for all of us. It was validation for friends and fans everywhere that Lennon had finally arrived. 3 years later, although you’ve still never heard of him, he’s known and respected by his musical peers and actually has quite a sizeable following across the pond and in pockets of the American midwest. Don told me once that getting to Sweden to do a show and watching a large crowd sing his lyrics back to him was a truly mind-blowing experience.
“Musically, Downtown sounds a little like Belle & Sebastian fronted by Bruce McCulloch from “Kids in the Hall.” – Pitchfork.
There are songs of Don’s I have grown to like better in the days since 2002, but Really Dave Matthews is what I always shove on to the uninitiated. His first 2 albums are also very special in my opinion, but it’s best not to dig too deeply into the crates right off the bat. Because RDM is a perfect summary of some of the bigger guns in Lennon’s developing arsenal – subtle humor, pop culture references and tunes so catchy that you’ll inevitably be asked to stop whistling one or two of them at some stage. Aggressively.
“I’m not really making fun of Dave Matthews. It’s hard to point to one line where I make fun of him. You just couldn’t do it.” – Don Lennon
The song’s protagonist is a first year college student who pretends to like Dave Matthews in order to impress a girl. He’s a better man than I. Sure, I’ve pretended to be things to impress a girl before – sensitive, a good listener, heterosexual – but to lower myself to the level of the DMB army just to get a little dorm room action? That’s a grenade not even I would be willing to jump on. It’s sweet, earnest and I dare you not to whistle the denoument/outro to yourself at any point today after listening. You know the Routine – Listen to Don Lennon’s “Really Dave Matthews” right now on Last.FM.
