Something’s Got To Give.

I’m really looking forward to digging a hole and crawling into it just as soon as I possibly can. Things have gotten overwhelming fast, and I am looking for ways to quickly cull the herd of stress monkeys stampeding through my weakening psyche. Yoga, aromatherapy and hard drugs aren’t going to cut it. I have to learn how to say “no”. Learn how to say “I am too busy”. Learn how to change my phone number and mailing address before I’m found pushing a shopping cart full of dead squirrels through the Public Garden.

What I should do is stop managing my building. But I’m going to press on, as the worst is almost over. I’m not worried about jinxing myself because short of Godzilla, locusts, nuclear termites or Tom Hanks and Shelly Long moving in – the worst is definitely almost over. It has to be, or I’ve obviously got to start considering the possibility that I may have somehow angered a Mayan God at some point. What I am going to do, is wrap up all the side-projects I have on the go that aren’t making me any money. This blog being one of several exceptions.

Family – I don’t talk about much here. The job – same rules apply, however I will say that both are a bit fucked at the moment. Life happens, and I’m not cruising for sympathy by any means. There are 8 million stories in the windy city, afterall. I’m simply getting the monkeys down in writing to help me figure out a way to combat their growing numbers. Membership is way up this year. I don’t make enough money, have enough ex-wives or have lived the sort of evil life that should warrant me considering becoming a sherpa at 32.

The most important thing I have decided to do, and I’ll likely live to regret publicizing this, is to cut down on the vices and stock way up on the healthy. Vices may constitute beer or frozen DiGiorno’s pizzas. Healthy might consist of a new gym membership or a garden salad. I haven’t figured out the details yet, but have been running some personal experiments that have proven promising in terms of productivity and clarity. This isn’t a mid-year resolution. This is a sea change. I’m calling my shot, and you can just watch me. Besides – Tiernan’s is history. That’s bound to add 5 years to my life right there.

Sort it out, Pye. Sort it out. Sherping awaits.