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Search Results for: davepye

Pigskins and Puppies


in Animalistic, Sporty

I commemorated the holiday this year by sleeping until 11am, finally finishing the massive Brother Fish and then cleaning up my house. As all of my clients are American, no one noticed or cared about my personal day, and I hope everyone is currently gorged on turkey and watching TV with a glass of dry white left over from dinner in their hand. It snowed up here in Portland for the first time this morning and I realized since this house was built in 2004 no one has actually lived here late in the season enough to see snow. I am going to take some photos for my folks tomorrow and I’m sure it will be as strange for them as it was for me. Raise that glass to me at this point and toast to my not freezing to death in a couple of months only to be discovered come spring sitting upright and bearded in the filthy dining room with a half-finished letter bomb in front of me.

OJ Thanksgiving

Does anyone know who won the Concord / Bedford football game today? I couldn’t find it mentioned online. I did get one especially exciting piece of news, however. Pixie, the mother of my soon to be puppy, is almost ready to drop. The breeder sent me some adorable new photos and poor Pixie looks fit to pop. She is due by the end of the weekend, apparently, so I may be making a trip over to Seeley’s bay to see my future best friend very, very soon. Wee Shepherd Pye cometh!

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Eat a Little Turkey, Feel a Little Jerky


in Consumables, Heartwarming

It’s sad and quite a bit shitty to be sitting alone on what is usually my very favorite night of the entire year. The night before American Thanksgiving is when you’re supposed to travel back to your home town, hit a local bar or house party and get sillier than a horn of plenty with your high school friends whom you only ever see once a year on this night. When I returned from England in 1999 after about 5 years away from the Concord scene, I thought the tradition was long since dead. Little did I know the fun we had yet to have over the next 7 years. The Red House, the reunions, the Razzi. Many of my contemporaries couldn’t care less about staying in touch with their old school crew and that’s their prerogative – God forbid I should someday have a family and “normal life”. But I wouldn’t have had it any other way, and I sure miss y’all tonight.

The best Thanksgivingy passtime I could come up with for my self this evening was to sift back through folders and folders of old photos and assemble my favorites into a 60-deep Ghosts of Thanksgiving Past gallery. I hope you laugh if you were there and snicker a little bit even if you weren’t. At the very least you can watch us lose our hair. I’ll surely be tasting Jimmy’s deep fried turkey tomorrow as I catch up on work while all my American clients take the day off to stuff their respective faces. Great memories, great friends and trust me kids – there’s no way I’ll miss it two years in a row.

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It’s Official: I am an American Citizen


in Heartwarming

Yesterday I took my oath and was sworn in as a United States Citizen in Boston’s awesome and historic Faneuil Hall. I sat in the main gallery with nearly 400 other people from every corner of the world who, like me, had decided to go through the long and arduous nationalization process. I sat near a friendly Russian and had a great conversation with my new buddy from Ghana who’s name I have no idea how to spell – so I’m not going to insult him by trying. Hopefully he will check in here himself and set me straight. We told many jokes, poked fun at some of the more breathtaking patriotic apparel and shared a real awe of the absolute hell many of the people in that room had to endure to get there. Congratulations to us all, and good luck in Texas, buddy. I’ll see you in Canada when you come to visit.

Tonight we’re having an informal gathering to mark the occasion of Citizen Pye at Silvertone in downtown Boston. If you’re not looking to shoot me for any reason, I invite you to drop in. We’ll be in the back room after 9pm. Here is a photo taken by my sister outside Faneuil after the ceremony yesterday. The document I’m holding cost me roughly $3,000 in terms of fees, plane tickets and lawyers – but it is beautiful and worth every cent. I only wish the passport photo used wasn’t taken so soon after I bashed in my face last December. I’m lucky for that reason my application wasn’t tossed into the circular file in the Tip O’Neil Building.

United States Naturalization Document

While we’re on the subject of photos, I have added a few new galleries to the site. Check out the rest of the photos from yesterday as well as various other shots from my latest Boston trip: Dave’s a Yankee Doodle Dandy. Then have a gander at the photos I took last weekend when Jason and Amy came to visit me in Portland. It’s a beautiful part of the country and the leaf peeping was sublime: Best Buddies Awesome Autumn Invitational. Also feel free to politely peruse photos from a Halloween party where I appeared as Indiana Jones, as well as a collection from another recent jaunt to Newport Rhode Island: October 2007. And finally, you might just find a picture of yourself in my tribute to the last few Halloween celebration ingeniously entitled: Ghosts of Halloweens Past. Having read and viewed all of the aforementioned, if you’re not thoroughly sick of my nutty life – you really should be. Looking forward to seeing many of you tonight.

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Biologically I am in Fact a Grown Man


in Heartwarming, Movies

My folks just took off to Florida for the winter and I am officially Ted Kaczinsky. Alone, in the woods, growing a beard, writing a manifesto and sending C4 through the mail to people I don’t like whilst dressed up like Weird Al Yankovich. Not really. If it’s any less disturbing, and let’s face it – it probably isn’t – the Indiana Jones costume I have prepared for a Halloween party tonight in Kingston is tres, tres dope. If I do say so Myself. Let me break it down for you.

  • An authentic Indiana Jones hat which I bought online from the company who makes them for the movies.
  • An $8 bullwhip replica I found on eBay. The real thing goes for $700.
  • One of my father’s replica revolvers, complete with holster, which looks frighteningly authentic. If I am shot to death tonight by the OPP there need be little question as to why.
  • An over the shoulder belt and WWII satchel that my Mom sewed out of an old canvas beach bag prior to  her departure.
  • Khaki pants which are fairly faithful to those worn by Harrison.
  •  An off-white collared shirt with a few pockets and things that I found in my Dad’s golf closet.

I tried it on for the first time a couple hours ago and I’m quite happy with it. After I put it on at my party location, I will proceed to smear a little dirt on myself and bloody up my knuckles like I’ve been battering Nazis and/or Thuggees for two hours. The hat is perfect and really makes the whole costume. I will post photos of the Indy getup next week and I invite you to send in your own 2007 Halloween costume photos which I’ll post and review, should I get any. Email them to me and then brace yourselves.

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Reminiscelets: Tough Crowd and Moby


in Politics, Reminiscent, Television

Four years and a thousand entries ago, I started this blog – knowing full well I probably wouldn’t maintain it but that it would be a learning experience relevant to my line of work. Who knew? I recently added a “On this date three years ago” feature in the sidebar in the hopes of getting a few eyeballs on some of the Pye in the Face canon. But I don’t think that’s really enough – especially where search engines are concerned. So I’m going to take time out now and then to draw attention to past posts I think are pretty cool and that you very likely missed.

Three years ago the thoroughly unique and enjoyable Tough Crowd was canceled by Comedy Central – much to my chagrin. I wrote a bunch of posts on the subject that I know were passed around and read by people involved with the show – including Jim Norton, Laurie Kilmartin, Patrick from Cringe Humor and probably even Colin Quinn himself. If you want to learn why I liked the show so very much, follow some of the Tough Crowd related links you see in this paragraph. That’s the whole point. This is how we play the reminiscelets game. My good friend Brukakke and I drove to New York to see the last Tough Crowd episode taping and even made it onto the show via an audience shot that you can see below. We met a lot of the guys and it was good closure for us. We were probably the equivalent of Tough Crowd superfans.

Tough Crowd Last Episode

Another article I read over recently and got a chuckle out of was in response to a blog entry by Moby right after the 2004 election. Moby was so distraught that George Bush had been re-elected that he was asking Canadians if it was alright if he moved up there. I was only too happy to give him an answer. You won’t often see me talk about politics on PITF, or draw attention to when I’ve done it in the past, so enjoy it while you can.

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Notes from the North


in Canadiana

I’m feeling terse today. Succinct. Extremely bullety. It’s a good morning for a brain dump. A blog blathering. Should I just give ‘er? I’ll give ‘er…

– The GPS system, called TeleNav, that I have on my new BlackBerry 8800 is astoundingly accurate and full-featured. I did not expect it nor realize that the phone came with it – but I use it all the time and it kicks touchas. $10 a month.
– My baby mamma still is not pregnant with wee Shepherd. This puts my puppy acquisition date back until at least March. I don’t want to – but I may look elsewhere for a pooch. I was so looking forward to having the wee ‘un with me while I’m alone during the winter.
– I found a treadmill of all things in the garage and I wheelbarrowed it over to the main house and plugged ‘er in. It works, and I’ve set up a spare TV and DVD player in front of it so I’ll have a nice winter hamster wheel.
– My client roster is growing by leaps and bounds – 5 new contracts last month alone – and I have been interviewing local people to help me. I found a great writer and a sharp marketing whiz via the Canadian version of CraigsList and we’re having a meeting in Kingston Thursday.
– I updated Cornett’s wedding gallery with about 40 more pictures so be sure to check it out. If only to see the adorable wee flower girl, Olivia.
– I have ordered several books on Canadian History to read over the snowy months, as I moved to Massachusetts when I was 12 and never learned any at the high school level. The fact that I moved to Concord didn’t help matter much – we kinda had our hands full in the old history department.
– My keyboard popped it’s V and B keys the other day for no apparent reason whatsoever. I’m starting to think Poltergeist – tis the season. Luckily there are no pubescent girls in the house or we’d really see the crockery flying off the walls. As I am an enormous fan of the CTRL+V paste shortcut, this is driving me batty. They won’t re-attach and I am gonna have to shell out for a new keyboard. Frig.

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Friday’s Quizzlet: Cocky Corellians are Interesting


in Friday's Quizzlet

Appetizer: On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being highest, how much do you look forward to your birthday?
As you get older, you really stop caring. You start to look forward to not having anyone mark the occasion as much as you used to tearing the paper off a Han Solo figure. Click that link, by the way. I found that in my Grandmother’s closet while cleaning out her house this summer and it’s in pristine condition and worth about $500 on eBay because of the bilingual packaging and the fact that it’s the original 1977 model with the big head before they redid it to look like Harrison Ford. So yeah, birthdays. Don’t really care that much anymore.

Soup: What is one word you don’t like the sound, spelling, or meaning of?
There are three words that have recently made it on to my peeve list, and this is as good a time as any to mention them. The first word isn’t really a word. It’s “Hmmmm…” after you answer a question someone has asked you. As in “Yes, that is how I feel about this political issue, thank you for asking” followed by a “Hmmmm…” from the inquisitor. It’s patronizing, regardless of what the topic of conversation is – and it drives me around the bend. The second word is used in the exact same way and circumstance. “Interesting”. Both are cop outs used by people that think they don’t like what you’ve just told them, and want you to know it, but have no mental ammo to back anything they take issue with up. Fuck off, all of you. The third word that I hate is “passionate”. “What are you passionate about?” What kills me is that people think this is such a cerebral, first date sort of a question. “What are you passionate about?” “Paying the check and getting the hell away from you, you hideous witch.”

Salad: Do you wear sunglasses when you’re outside? If so, what does your current pair look like?
I have a nice pair which I keep in my car, and about 4 other passable, gas-station P.O.S. pairs that I take with me as I’m very prone to losing them. As I’m not currently… Elton John… my sunglasses look like sunglasses.

Main Course: If you were to write a book, to whom would you dedicate it?
Probably my Mother, who has been telling me I was born to be a children’s author for years. I took a stab at developing an idea online a few years ago, and I’m still not sure it’s a bad one. For now it sits neglected on the web amongst the bones of 30 other half-baked ideas. It tends to get a lot of traffic at Halloween, though. Probably by parents trying to scare their kids straight because they think I’m on hard drugs for basing a kids’ character on Frank Sinatra.

Dessert: Name a beverage that you enjoy.
I’m drinking a lot more milk these days. In Canada, they sell milk in bags that you then bring home and plop into a plastic holder with a handle. Then you snip one of the top corners off using a little magnet knife kept stuck to the fridge. Every Canadian household has one, and mine is yellow. It’s cheaper, you get more and I love it. Look at the big bones on Dave, everyone.

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Congratulations Amy and Chris!


in Heartwarming

Two dear friends of mine got married this past Saturday, and I’ve just completed a wedding gallery of the extremely fun day. I flew down from Ottawa last Wednesday and extended the trip beyond the weekend in order to visit friends and get in some office time – but it was really all about the weddin’. The way the ceremony and reception were organized really stood out in my mind, as the whole day seemed planned in the interests of making it ‘low-impact’ for the guests. Semi-formal, private home, shuttle back to the hotel, great room rate – and the ceremony itself lasted barely 15 minutes. The elegant simplicity of things in no way diminished any traditions – it was easily the most emotionally charged wedding I’ve ever been to.

We love ya, kids. Here’s to a great life together, and I hope you’re currently ruining bedsprings all over Martha’s Vineyard. Enjoy yourself, Chrissy. We have a lot of work to do when you get back.

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Back to the Back to the Bean, Y’all


in Travels

I’ll be heading into Boston tomorrow at 3pm for the first time in quite a while, and obviously I’m beyond excited to see my friends, attend my buddy’s wedding and finally have a Harpoon IPA. Words cannot begin to describe how much I have missed this particular beverage, and I’ll likely be marinated in it like an over sized steak tip by the time I return to Canada. To say I miss Boston would be true, but not all that much to be totally honest. I’ll be back again in October for business and by the time the snow flies I’ll have likely had enough to last me through the winter. What I will miss is Thanksgiving at the infamous Red House in Concord – but what are you gonna do? It’s been sold and that last bastion of high-school hijinks is now ancient history. I’m sure the boys will come up with another bastion.

Today I am taking my father to the International Plowing Match in Crosby, Ontario. I went once when I was a tadpole and remember it being a big fair laid out like a town with streets of vendors hawking tractor toys and fried dough. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to get my work done to ensure that I don’t have to miss the Queen of the Furrow Crowning Banquet later this evening. You can’t win if you don’t attend.

There are many hotels in Amsterdam to choose from when traveling in Europe and getting the best price for your stay online. There is a list of Rome hotels that shows how nice European hotels are like when visiting Barcelona or any other part of the world. You can save the most on hotels in Rome and Amsterdam hotels when you research online.

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Veekend Video: Doug and Doug’s Fantasy Rules


in Veekend Video

Why are these degenerate animals gracing my site this afternoon? They're both old friends of mine, and I sincerely hope their latest venture gets them the attention they deserve. Particularly from the Special Victims Unit of the LAPD. They've been polluting the atmosphere together for so long now that their dialogue and riffing is a natural instinct. It flows and it's really, really funny. If you missed their brilliant turn two years ago hosting Me Myself and Irene – please enjoy their new area of expertise which is Fantasy Football, apparently. The image below is a screenshot which will take you to the video on Comedy.com – their embedding URL isn't working for me.

Doug and Doug

Fantasy Football has completely revolutionized the way husbands ignore their wives and Doug & Doug are here to completely revolutionize fantasy football with their unconventional wisdom. Join the dynamic duo for their inaugural 2007 Draft and get the picks that George Tenet called a "slam dunk."

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