Pop Culture Blog: Music, Movie and Humor

Leveraging low-hanging synergies outside the vertical fruit box since 1999.

Mardi Mardi – We Likes To Party… Gras.


in Heartwarming

It’s been 3 months since the Halloween bender, and I’m gettin’ all itchy for another par-tay. I don’t think it’s a personal hygiene issue. But rather a desire to rage against the dying of my New Years resolutions. Actually rage towards would be a more accurate description. Join me, won’t you?

Unless you suffered a head injury in a snowmobiling accident over the weekend, you’ve probably surmised that it’s a Mardi Gras theme. Just what does that entail? Glad you asked. We’re going to have Eric the DJ spinning until 2, the Corona girls wandering around encouraging debauchery, some door prizes courtesy of a local radio station, a specially themed drink menu and as always there is absolutely no cover! I should also probably mention that it’s Saturday, February 19th at Tiernans.



                Titties ‘Till Fat Tuesday – Get those beads ready, boys.

So bring your beads, Girls Gone Wild camera crews, silly hats, disturbing masks and all the other trappings of a proper Mardi Gras celebration. I get ribbed a lot because I plan for parties way in advance. Well this time around you’ve got a little under two weeks. Get a babysitter, a designated driver, a tetanus shot – whatever you need to get yourselves down to Tiernans for the festivities. You won’t be sorry.

I’d love to see anyone who’s interested at the bender in question, and you can click here for more details. Feel free to add yourself and your friends to the Evite. Come one, come all. Unless of course I owe you money or have at any point impregnated you.

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Patriots and Cheeky Monkeys.


in

I’m happy to report that I managed not to set fire to myself for the remainder of the weekend. I spent most of yesterday working on this boston hairstylist site, and then Monster and I went out to Concord for Jim’s super-duper-bowl-party. About 20 of us ate, drank and were very merry as the Pats secured their… actually I refuse to say the ‘D’ word anymore. People will think I’m one of the Mings or something. Jim’s corn/chili chowder was the other highlight of the evening, as was seeing Jodice’s daughter Nicole – who is the most adorable little munchkin I know. Maybe next time though we’ll find a game to play other than ‘spit in Dave’s face after eating 3 oatmeal raisin cookies’.

Far be it from me to pass along silly internet videos, but this is one Colin sent me that you have got to see. The premise is this: extremely dexterous monkey torments three young tigers in the jungle. They bumblingly try to catch him as he swings down from the trees, pulls their tails and tweaks their ears and noses. The funny thing is, the monkey serves no purposes by risking his life in this manner. He’s just messing with the youngsters. A truly mischievous and cheeky little bastard. Check it out.

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I’m The Firestarter.


in

Life is good this week. My old roomate is out and a new one is on the way in. Everything is back the way I like it, and my pad is once again it’s clean, spartan old self – sans mounds of useless curio crap that left with its owner. I’ve been painting, sweeping, mopping, consolodating, dusting and this place just looks amazing if I do say so myself.

That is until I just set fire to it.

I’m hiding in my room right now as the nasty burnt nylon/goosedown smoke clears. I had a candle near my new $160 jacket which apparently burst into flames simply due to the heat. I was downstairs loading what crap the old roomie didn’t take into the basement when I heard the fire alarm go off. I rushed upstairs to find the entire coat ablaze. A few good puffs from yours truly and it was all over, but my newly restored sanctum has been putrified.

The funny thing is, I heard that Thursday night the old roomate’s new bedroom caught on fire too. Has anyone seen Drew Barrymore walking around the North End?

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Double Secret Probation. And Death.


in Movies

John Vernon, one of the most consistently effective onscreen villains of all time – best known as Animal House’s Dean Wormer – died Tuesday at the age of 72. Born in Zehner, Saskatchewan, Vernon played baddies opposite legends like Lee Marvin and Clint Eastwood. He then spent his twilight years doing voiceovers for popular cartoons and video games, working right up until the time he cashed in his chips.

One of his last appearences was for 2003’s DVD release of Animal House, where he participated in a ‘where are they now?’ segment in character as Wormer. I’ve seen it and it’s hilarious. Also funny is that I just watched this movie just last weekend whilst playing ‘Asshole’ with Seamus and Meredith. I laughed for 2 minutes at the quote below, until remembering I was 31 years old and drinking heavily at 3 in the afternoon.



“Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son.”



Then I kept right at it. What would Blutowski have done? Oh yeah – dead at 33. Forget I brought it up.

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Friday’s Quizzlet: The Purple Pyeman.


in Monday's Quotelet

Appetizer: If you were a dog, what breed would you be, and why?

My breed would be irrelevant as I’d be constantly holed up under a porch licking myself.

Soup: What does the color purple make you think of?

A crosseyed Oprah Winfrey. A people-eater. Some guy who lived on Porcupine Peak and continuously tried to diddle Strawberry Shortcake. The L.A. Kings. Bondage videos involving testicles and shoelaces.

Salad: Approximately how long does it take you to get ready each morning?

That depends on how many people I have to drive back to the high school.

Main Course: How many cousins do you have, and are you close to them?

I have 7 first cousins and 4 second cousins. My mother was an only child so I suppose that’s resulted in less than most. But when you’re trying to buy their love at Christmas because you only see them once a year – less is a good thing.

Dessert: Take your initials (first, middle, last) and come up with something else those letters could stand for. (Example: SFO = Sweet Funny Otter)

I wish my initials were S.G. and that I had never been given a middle name so that my answer could be Silly Goose! But since that’s not the case: Don Johnson’s Penis. Come on, you were all thinking it.

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